Friday, January 20, 2023

Twilight of the gods: The David Crosby Yankees Song Book

Sing along, campers...


Three runners and Rothschild’s coming!
This save has been finally blown!
Altuvi hears trash cans drumming,
Four runs off El Chapo!


There is a season, Boone, Boone,
Never a reason, Boone, Boone, Boone...
And a time for every pitcher
Signed by Cashman.


Now Scott Proctor’s bombed and bagged,
And he's hanging in the air,
Won’t you trade him to Chicago
For a buck.
On a bullpen run by Torre,
How can he still be out there?
Won’t you trade him to Chicago
For a fucking rubber duck!


Almost cut my hair...
Happened just the other day.
Heard I was gettin' dealt
To New York for Sonny Gray.


Teach your prospects well,
For they'll know hell,
Four years in Scranton...


Wooden mitts, on the catcher,
Gary's so uneasy.
Striking out the way
It's supposed to be, so breezy... 

16 comments:

Carl J. Weitz said...

Excellent!
Excellent!
Excellent!

Daveyhead said...

What Carl said.

Eddhall69 said...

Unfortunately, only one of those songs was a Crosby song. Although he did play on the others.

Publius said...

The reason why
Ain't hard to say
Listen up, Cash
Please go away

After what you did
You can't stay on
And we'll all feel a whole lot better
When you're gone

Publius said...

(A McGuinn tune, I think, but the Croz contributed)

Mildred Lopez said...


This is all brilliant!

Carl J. Weitz said...

If Cashman had ever been here before
He would probably know just what to do
Don't you?
If Boonie had ever been here before
On another time around the wheel
He would probably know just how to deal
With all of his players.

It’s 2023 And I feel
Like I've been here before
Feel
Like I've been here before
And you know
It makes me wonder
What's going on
In the Yankees Bloated Front Office



There is a stadium in south Bronx, oh no
With Southern Comfort in my cup, not much to spare
In my mind, I still think Cole has one more pitch to throw
All Boone’s pitching changes are never quite there.
Blue, blue pinstripes on the Yankee stars
A fastball from Chad Green over the fence and on the rise
Boo birds crying across the stadium sky
Throwing beer drops on our eyes
Leave us
Helpless, helpless, helpless

Boonie can you hear me now? (Helpless, helpless, helpless)
The chains are locked and tied across his managerial door
Blog, sing with me now (helpless, helpless, helpless)




HoraceClarke66 said...

Our team
Is a very, very, very fine team
With no one in left field
Or an bullpen left to wield
Life used to be so easy
With the Stick...

I know, I know. Graham Nash. Still...



Doug K. said...

Duque - Genuinely funny. Laughed several times.

"Altuvi hears trash cans drumming,
Four runs off El Chapo!"

Doesn't get better than that.

The Scott Proctor song is extraordinarily good.


Doug K. said...

In other Yankeeish news...

The Mariners DFA'd Justus Sheffield.

And the Pirates DFA'd Miguel AnDUjar.

Who want's to get the band back together? :)

Doug K. said...

and in non Yankee News from NBCnews.com

"A chatbot that lets you talk with Jesus and Hitler is the latest controversy in the AI gold rush"

So... Customer Service?

"Look, Jesus we're not getting anywhere. I'm going to need to talk to Hitler."

BTR999 said...

This is Gold, Duque, Gold!

I really loved it!

BTR999 said...

Jesus, if you can’t stick with the Pirates on a minimal salary
, who can you stick with?

Kevin said...

Hilarious parodies! Over the past two years that I have discovered and followed this blog I've wondered what the main contributors did/do in their real" lives. How about a series of "What's my line"? Pay to play! Or maybe a mini-bio. Fictitious names, natch'.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

I am President of Freedonia.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Hilarious, Doug K.! The Jesus/Hitler bit, I mean.

Andujar and Sheffield were released? I'm smelling a big year...for Scranton!