Call off your dogs, Selig. It's over. You won.

Call off your dogs, Selig. It's over. You won.

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Arod lives in a hospital

Everyone has an opinion on Arod. Everyone.

I, myself, have 32. Today, I'm announcing a new one:

Inside Alex Rodriguez lurks an architecturally repressed Nazi protologist.

How else do you explain this "house?" (I use the term with great uncertainty, but this certainly doesn't warrant the word "home.") It looks more like an alcohol rehab center. It's not a dwelling. It's an institute. A prison. An armed fortress. It looks designed by a fourth-grade class working with Leggos. Who would want to live inside such a place? Magneto?

Is this how the super-rich spend their money these days? Along with gates on their neighborhood, they hide inside concrete blast shelters? This thing must have 10 panic rooms. No wonder America's billionaires - our Justice League - have become so screwy; they live inside mental hospitals.

Apparently, ARod plans to sell this monstrocity for $38 million. Good luck on that.

Hell, I'd consider it. But only as a tear-down. 

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