Also, I was attempting the ultimate, last-ditch juju move:
The Don't Watch.
Everybody has tried it. You don't watch, and your team wins. It's a kamikaze move of personal juju, not something to throw out willy-nilly or higgedy-piggedy. If the Yankees had won last night, I would keep not-watching until the end - theoretically, I could never see another victory. If the Don't Watch had worked - (and it has, at times) - and the Yankees rolled 12-0, took the Wild Card, the playoffs and the World Series, launching the greatest Yankee streak in history, I would have only read about it in the Gammonite Gabfestss. That's the personal hell I was prepared to inhabit.
Well, the bastards didn't even throw me a bone.
Fortunately, I am not one of those jujuists who try things like the Cut Off Your Ear (though it worked for Picasso's rugby team.) So now, there is nothing left to fling at the plaster wall. I am out of juju, like Lindsay Lohan is out of DWI arrests, and the Yankees are out of bullpen arms. Soon - I'm thinking Toronto - we will be ejected from the race like one of Hideki Matsui's famous porno DVDs, and we can contemplate the long list of Good Things That Happened to the Yankees in 2013.
Good Things That Happened to the Yankeees in 2013
1. Lyle Oy-Vey.
2. Alfonso Soriano (for a month)
3. Sean Kelly
4. Mariano and Robbie (both farewell tours?)
5. Toronto was worse.
6. The Mets were worse.
7. The Los Angeles Angels of Alzheimers were worst of the worse.
It's going to be a long, cold winter.