Reject last night's outcome as "fake sports," fire the scorekeeper, and simply claim first place in the AL East.
Fill stadiums with troops from the National Guard, slap 50-percent tariffs on games vs Toronto, and demand to see the papers of every opposing batter, as he steps to the plate: If he hits a home run, send him and his family to Alligator Alcatraz. Replace Dave & Suzyn with Vlad Putin & Laura Loomer, and gaslight the hell out of every broadcast. And give Aaron Boone the measles.
Of course, it won't work. We suffer from more than the rising price of beef. The bottom of our order doesn't hit, and our bullpen is an unpinned grenade.
Somewhere, in the unwritten rule book of human behavior, it says that you cannot trot out five pitchers per night without at least one crapping the bed. Last night, it was Yerry de los Santos - a generally decent lug nut - who gave up three runs, killing the vibes of a tiresome, dismal, rain-soaked, nothing burger. Amazon Prime should demand its money back. If last night were a package, I'd return it.
Beyond the loss, the Death Barge had a chance to sweep a team they've owned - at least, until last night. Who cannot sense that, along with a game in the measly wild card race, they just relinquished whatever mastery they once held over Minnesota, a young team that seemed to start backpedaling as soon as they reached the Bronx - a team that now realizes that the mighty Yankees are made of butter. Next month, we'll play three games in Minnesota. This time, the Twins won't be quaking in their cleats.
Every night, we watch the Yankees systematically surrender a winnable game. It's amazing to think that, barely two months ago, they were challenging for the best record in baseball. What followed is one of the worst stretches in modern Yankee history. And it's time to start labeling it as such.
People: This is not a cold spell. This is the '25 Yankees.
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6 comments:
This is not a good team. In fact, it's only half a team. Going nowhere.
Kind of like the Mets.
Best record cannot survive the worst manager.
Or even the wurst manager.
Aura and Mystique
Are definitely long dead.
Yankees blow Schilling.
There are some very knowlegable posters on this site and I would love it if you could give me your thoughts
You own the Yankees and have full control of all aspects of the team at every level
What would your moves be
I mean reasonable achievable ones not fantasy of spending a billion dollars on payroll
I am reluctant to put down my thoughts incase you laugh as I am still learning about baseball and dont want to appear foolish or ill infomed
But here goes
Sack Boone and Cashman ( guess everyone would do this)
Total root and branch changing of every single part of the organisation from strength and conditioning and nutrition to playing side
Emphisis on the lower levels of the minor league in baseball fundementals baserunning bunting advancing runners cut off men all fielding basically and hitting and pitching to contact and throwing away of what seems to me the seems like obession of launch angles and exit velocity in hitting and spin rates and speed of pitches
Looking to entice away scouts and coaches of teams who seem every year to draft and develop players better than we do and this is teams who do not draft early Im thinking the Carninals and Braves here
Regarding free agents and current players nobody gets more than a 4 year deal unless it has a optout for the team no more long term bloated contratcs to players in their 30's
Probably a lot of rubbish but I would really like to here your expert and informed ideas of what you could realistically do
Not that I like them, but long term contracts are sometimes necessary and those times can be justified (by management, not me) by averaging the contract over the "effective" years of the players contract. Unfortunately, the Yankees are slow to jettison players when their contract outlives their effectiveness.
Otherwise, spot on.
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