Wednesday, January 30, 2013

How to completely rid baseball of performance enhancing drugs


Simple:

Each October, have the two worst teams play in the World Series.

7 comments:

Mustang said...

Then we'll have to worry about performance-debilitating drugs. Like the ones I take.

bennyboy said...

According to your logic, because we can't fully solve the problem, we should avoid putting any effort in at all. Therefore, since we can't stop all gun violence, we shouldn't pass a new assault weapons ban.

Your logic leads you to being an NRA card carrying Republican, Duque. I know you don't want that.

el duque said...

I'm simply saying that you cannot reverse a million years of evolution in the realm of human survival behavior.

No pro sport will never again be able to be sure that its most successful athletes are free of PEDs. It will never happen. There will always be a new masking agent, or a revolutionary doping scheme, or a cutting edge drug that evades the tests. Thus, anybody who wins too often - anybody who reaches greatness - will raise suspicions. We might as well get used to it. Whomever is the next A-Rod, people will accuse him of juicing.

So singling out a player here and there is like the way the NFL is trying to deal with concussions. They penalize defensive backs for hard hits. But the problem is everywhere - far more than a few hits in a game - and yet they pretend that they're making a difference.

The NFL avoids the PED problem by simply not bothering with it. Does anybody believe 350 pound linemen and 250 pound running backs aren't juicing? Good grief. There must so many holes in their testing protocols that they are a joke.

Tom said...

Really, you mean Ray Rice didn't get those arms just from doing push-ups? And all those big guys on the line who now look as quick and agile as Michael Jordan ... ? Man, next thing you're going to tell me is that there is no Santa Claus.
All you have to do is go back 25 years and look at the video, back when baseball players were humans of normal proportions. Yes, training and nutrition have improved, but 1987 Don Mattingly would be a utility infielder today, sizewise.
As Duque says, drugs are now part of the backstory in every sport. Fact of life. And if we can use that fact to get rid of the spineless, preening A-Rod, well, by golly, do it. I don't give a hoot about the team's money, but he has not been fun to watch, and I doubt he'll be improving much.

Anonymous said...

Leave your political commentary I'm your wife's purse next to her Valtrex prescription.

Jim "Bulldog" Bouton? said...

Greenies, anyone?

bennyboy said...

I agree with your sentiment Duque, but not the conclusion. Just because human nature will lead human beings to cheating doesn't mean we should tolerate cheating. The dramatic decline in offensive production in recent years reflects the fact that the MLB can significantly mitigate the steroid problem in baseball.

You're also 100% right about the NFL. We all know they juice, and fans don't seem to care. But fans do care about players becoming mentally ill in their elder years, and they do get perturbed at the high rate of injury in the sport. I think injuries would be less prevalent in the NFL if linebackers weren't 400 pounds, faster than cars and stronger than apes. The sport suffers indirectly as a result of steroids. Nothing in life comes for free. There's always a price to be paid sooner or later. Besides, two wrongs don't make a right.