Wednesday, January 9, 2013

"Your wife tastes like Honey Nut Cheerios," the first catchphrase of 2013

Reportedly, two nights ago in MSG, Boston's Kevin Garnett came up with the nastiest taunt since  Don Rickels called Little Richard a hockey puck.  He blew Carmelo Anthony's circuit boards by saying Carmelo's ex-wife, La La Vazquez - (no relation to Javier) - "tastes like Honey Nut Cheerios."

This, of course, is not true - Vazquez is believed to bathe not in breakfast cereals but a mixture of Roquefort cheese, salted vinegar and hair removal products. Of course, Garnett was using the literary device called metaphor to antagonize his opponent by attacking him where it hurts, in his imagination.

This is a well known method, most famously used to spawn the great fight between ARod and Jason Varitek:

"Hey, did Steinbrenner sign any free agents that lived?"

"Yeah? I'd cut you short, but somebody beat me to it."

"Yeah? So is 13 your number or your IQ?"
"Your sister wears Youkilis shoes!"


Now this. Honey Nut Cheerios - the first catchphrase punchline of 2013. The hockey puck is dead. Long live the Honey Nut.

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