BUY MY BOOK: BARD OF THE DEAL: THE POETRY OF DONALD TRUMP
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Posted by el duque at 8:23 AM
Yesterday, you went crazy because Alex Rodriguez's name was found scribbled on a piece of paper in an abandoned office. Ever since, you've been combing the stygian depths of the legal profession in hopes of finding a way to screw Arod out of his contract - and thus save the Steinbrenners heirs a little money.
Hey, with such loyal fans, the Yankees must surely feel secure when they step into the batters' box. In fact, next time a bar of soap drops in the Yankiverse shower, remind me not to bend over to pick it up.
Frankly, you disgust me. I speet on you.
Alex Rodriguez led us to the 2009 World Series. He won the MVP for us. Twice. He is recovering from a deteriorating hip, his second one. He is struggling to return to the team and contribute for the second half. He is injured. Nobody thinks he is faking it. He was benched in the post-season, having played in pain, and he never complained or used it as an excuse. In all his time as a Yankee, he has never jogged out a grounder, not one. His new "crime" is not even circumstantial - it's guilt by association, it's actually beyond that: He's been torpedoed by selected leaks to the media, which considers anything about Arod to be fair game. Oh, Yankiverse, and while you're siding with our owners - heirs who inherited the team - remember that they will basically just pocket all the money anyway, because they were gracious enough to not fight Bud Selig's new MLB rules that were surgically designed to destroy one team - the Yankees.
Actually, I take it back. Alex Rodriguez is guilty of one horrible crime. He grew old. Who knows? Maybe the drugs he took early in his career added to it. But let me assure you, Arod wasn't alone. He was just the biggest, fattest and easiest target to bring down. And many of the fukking self-righteous dorktards out there, the players holding him in contempt, are just Lance Armstrongs waiting to be undressed. And the sportswriters are the same ones that swallowed Manti Te'o - hook, line and catfish.
The Steinboys signed a bad contract with Arod. Nobody made them do it. They did it because they were fools. Now, they will put on a full-court press, with help from the sportswriting/access industry, to bring down the player and void the deal.
Listen: You can boo a guy for many reasons. Buy a ticket, and you get you yell whatever you want. And the Steinbrenners - not Arod - have built a system where only wealthy people can afford tickets. So boo Arod if you wish.
But for my money, you cannot boo a guy for getting old.
If Arod were hitting, if he were five years younger, you'd be rallying behind him.
And don't kid yourselves: After they take down Arod, they'll put a full-court press on Jeter. DON'T KID YOURSELVES, COMRADES. THEY WILL COME FOR MARIANO, AND THEY WILL COME FOR ANDY, AND THEY WILL COME FOR JETER. THERE WILL ALWAYS BE SCRAPS OF PAPER WITH SOMEBODY'S NAME ON IT.
Shame on you all. Shame, shame, shame. I speeet on you. Pttuuuuui.