So go the 2024 Yankees, a team destined to disappoint, if not humiliate - a team that raises hope and snuffs it out, right before our barely seeing eyes, a team that remains in first place because the competition is basically terrible.
Insert wretch here.
Three days ago, I ridiculously postulated that three games in DC against the 6th worst team in baseball would boost the Yankees like a BLV sandwich- that's bacon, lettuce and Viagra -and a chance to widen their lead over Baltimore as September arrived.
Well, shoot me.
I won't be spouting such nonsense again.
This we know about the '24 Yankees:
They play to the level of every opponent, regardless of talent or skills.
They have a second-baseman playing 3B, another second-baseman playing 1B, and their regular second-baseman should be a DH, if playing at all.
They feature a lineup of hitters who do not adjust their swings, depending upon a game situation. It doesn't matter if the moment absolutely requires that a ball be put into play. They just swing away, as always, untethered by the need.
Their bullpen can blow any lead, at any time, in any circumstance. The pitcher bombed today will go to Scranton tomorrow - and be back next week.
They might just squander the greatest season by a hitter in modern history. And this will be their second time.
They have allowed the contract issues of Juan Soto to fester into a distraction, if not a crisis, being mentioned on a daily basis - all because the owner, who has botched so many past deals, now regularly poormouths on the matter.
They entered August facing a schedule of cupcakes and tomato cans. They now stand at 14-and-13 for the month. They gained nothing.
Yep. Shoot me. Hopefully, I have learned my lesson.
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17 comments:
El Duque, haven’t you posted this (without the Soto part) for the last 10 years?
yeah, but, I think it’s especially poignant. It finally dawned on me why it feels so wierd to rip apart this “first place” team of ours. El Duque is right, The leauge is so diluted down, this roster CAN still be in first, even though it’s really only a few games better than .500 if it played in another era. PLUS, the waste of Judge’s talent is just terrible, he really is a generational slugger.
We need to let go at this point. It's best for our mental health.
We deserve better. We won't get it.
I just realized something. Something that’s very important and (stay with me here) could just explain everything that’s wrong with this team. Hal doesn’t care, Cashman is a phony and Boone is a buffoon.
Ye gads, man, I think you've put your finger on it!
INCREDIBLE!
One never knows what you will get from Rodon, who will definitely be starting in the postseason for us.
Meanwhile, the 2 man ream has become a one man team, Soto batting .111in his last 7 games, .189 in his last 15 games, .211 in August.
Our winning percentage is .436 against LHP.
The schedule is about to get a little tougher in September, including a WC trip - always our bête noire
I’m sure cashman & co will handle the upcoming roster crunch adroitly, aren’t you?
OH MY GOSH! There's a west coast trip????? Ok I already knew this and I am a ticket holding delusional skeptic ready to drag my arse into the Coliseum of Oakland before they close their doors for good. Last year I witnessed a perfect game. This year I'm expecting to see 1800 Oakland fans choking down concession food that's been stored in the zip loc baggies floating in underground sewage since the late 1990's.
My friends and I are in the expensive seats so our Lobs-Tar (not to be confused with the handful of malacostracans shoveled on to Hoss's plate by starstruck and distracted Yankee Stadium workers, drooling over dreams of a Jon Hamm sandwich) will be labeled into dixie cups for us to suck down an oyster. More on this late September games as we get closer . . . . .to IT.
LIKE an oyster
Princess Cole has got to be hurt. He's had 12 starts, carbon should be blown off the plugs by now and he still looks......rusty? No command at all and his fastball has no boost. I fully expect his arm to fly off before long.
LADLED not labeled. Where have you gone, preview setting. Many of us are sad that have left and miss you. Please come back before it gets dark. No one wants to be out there when it gets dark.
6-6 against the White Sox, Tigers, Rockies, and Nats. So much for “Big August”
Brilliant and poignant, Peerless Leader. And hilarious, AA! I've been in that Oakland Thunderdome; not a pretty experience. Glad you're getting a last look.
As for the Yankees...well, yeah. Their ridiculous approach to the game and constant injuries have once again doomed them. What a surprise!
They haven't even adjusted to the Age of Parody, uh, Parity. Look at how Houston has set up for the postseason, after playing hideously mediocre ball for most of the year. Among other things, they have...a lights-out closer.
This is the era of Texas-Arizona "Fall Classics," 4th-place teams against 6th-place. And the thing is, even these bumpkin franchises with owners who are every bit as miserly as Hal...at least know to hire wily GMs who can maneuver their teams into a World Series.
Not The Brain.
I hate this season so very very much.
"Shoot him now shoot him now! You keep out of this! He doesn't have to shoot you now...!
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