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Thursday, November 20, 2014

If Pat Venditte turns into a star in Oakland, there will bloodshed in the Bronx

After a thousand lifetimes mired within the Yankee farm system, Pat Venditte - the only switch-pitcher you or I will ever know - has been signed as a minor league free agent by Oakland.

Over seven seasons in the Yankee scrub lands, Venditte rose to Scranton, but never received so much as a courtesy cup of coffee. The Yankee "baseball people" - experts of the radar gun - detected flaws in his pitches, so he never got a call.

Fine. OK. No problem.

Surely, we accept that the Yankee "baseball people" knew what they were doing, by denying their fans so much as a glimpse of the lone switch-pitcher of his or any generation.

Thanks to the Yankee "baseball people," if we ever see Pat Venditte pitch, he will wear an A's uniform.

Just know this: If Venditte turns into a Major League star, there will be trouble.

That's all I'm going to say.

Trouble.

4 comments:

KD said...

Trouble? HA! Let other teams take the trouble and risk to develop this freak of nature. If he works out, we'll get him back on a three year deal when he's 38.

we're the fucking Yankees, dammit!

Federico said...

Duque--you keep threatening trouble--yet each time you're beaten bloody by the stupidity of the Yankee front office, you come back for more. I'm not sure which syndrome applies--The Cowardly Lion or The Abused Spouse.

el duque said...

I'm talking big trouble.

That's all I'm going to say.

DanAxtell said...

"...the only switch-pitcher you or I will ever know."

Actually, there are several promising switch pitchers in the pipeline, some of them inspired by Pat Venditte. See the Switch Pitching 101 Blog. (Note: that blogkeeper shares a last name with one of high school SwP's, so there might be a hint of bias.)