Urine Line For The Bathroom Anyway…

Off of 13Bit’s suggestion… 

“I think the Yankees should sell naming rights to individual urinals in the Stadium. Pay 5 grand and people can read your name on a plaque while they are pissing."

This is a great idea but why stop there?  Create The “Yankee Bathroom Experience” (YBE) and charge $5 just to use the restroom.

Or, as the Yankee Quarterly Financial Report will justify it, “Providing a new revenue stream by turning a stream into revenue.”

For example, they could rebrand the urinals as “Reliver’s Row”

As a special treat the urinals would have urine cakes modelled after the gloves of famous Yankee Catchers. Munson, Berra, and Dickey.  

NOTE: They shouldn’t use cakes modeled after Gary Sanchez’s mitt. It’s hard enough to keep the bathrooms clean without having half the piss miss the urinal and hit the wall.

Each urinal would be outfitted with a small speaker with a recording of 3B Coach Luis Rojas yelling, “Go! Go! Go!”

Bathroom stalls could be “The Booths”. Toilet handles could resemble radio microphones. Flush the toilet and hear Phil Rizzuto say, “Holy Cow!” or John Sterling say, “You can’t predict baseball.”

The sinks become “Clean Up Stations” each one honoring the great clean up hitters in Yankee History. Gehrig… Jackson… Gallo.  Note: The Gallo one will be out of order, but they promise it will be fixed by next season.

As patrons exit the YBE they hear a recording of Aaron Boone talking about what a good job they did. Even if they didn’t wash their hands.  

And don’t get me started on the merch…