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Monday, July 14, 2014

Seriously, does anyone NOT expect Carl Crawford to end up with the Yankees?

Over the weekend, the Los Angeles Mattinglys activated Carl "The Perfect Storm" Crawford from the DL, where he's been parked since late May. He's now riding the pines. He's going to sit until someone gets hurt, or retirement, or doomsday, or whichever comes first.

The Dodgers are paying him $20 million per. This is Year IV of a seven-year deal, originally cobbled together by the Redsock puppet master, Theo Epstein, himself. When The Perfect Storm twisted his ankle, The Perfect Storm was hitting .261 with 4 HRs - which are Ruthian numbers, were he a Yankee.

Obviously, we don't need The Perfect Storm. Clearly, we don't need another OF. Frankly, there is no metric in creation that can justify adding yet another old and declining, clown-faced pug to the Yankee roster. It would make absolutely no sense, and it would defy every long-term building strategy in Hal Steinbrenner's bottomless tank of putrid decisions.

So why, why, WHY... do we not doubt Crawford's future pinstripes destination? Of course, the Yankees will bite! OF COURSE THEY WILL! You think Hal won't imagine The Perfect Storm hitting 60 home runs in Yankee Stadium and leading the team to glory?

Besides, come August, nobody - not you, not me, nobody - is going to turn on the YES Network to watch Kyle Roller, Taylor Dugas and Jose Pirela. The not-perfect storm. Nope. Carl Crawford would provide a brief ratings blip - maybe a week of fan base hope, mixed with curiosity - and around that time, the Murdoch-owned network will be screaming at Hal to provide something, anything, that secures some attention, until Jeter's retirement can launch the final pageantry. (God help YES if Jeet turns an ankle and misses the last month.) Oh, the blogger side of the Yankiverse would scream and holler about the horror of such a move... but you know what? That's just more attention. Come August, the only true fear faced by the Yankee brass is that nobody - not you, not me, not nobody - will give a damn.

Good grief. How did I become so jaded about this team?

6 comments:

JM said...

I noted this morning that the Mets have said Colon is available for a trade.

So let's see, if we give the Mets JR Murphy and pick up Colon's paycheck, then we trade half of the AA team to LA for Crawford...yeah, it could work.

Think Giambi might be up for grabs? Damon says he's ready to play, too.

Alphonso said...

It is all Cashman's fault. And you, and everyone else, are letting him off the hook.

We should not write a single sentence more about the Yankees that doesn't call for his ouster.

Cashman is like a failed dictator who once basked in undeserved glory, and now simply shoots his citizens gathering in the street to protest.

Wake up.

Wake the fuck up.

Alphonso said...

You, in the above rant, refers to our esteemed leader. He can lead us. He can make it meaningful. I only scream and rage.

Anonymous said...

..GET CRAWFORD OUT OF LA.... EVEN IF YOU HAVE TO PAY THEM SOME..

ALSO ADD A. GONZALEZ 1B..THE AUTOMATIC DOUBLE PLAY OUT...TO THAT LIST..

ALSO...PEREZ......
ALSO.............MATTINGLY AND ALL HIS...' DO NOT ROCK THE BOAT "..MANAGERS..BATTING/ PICTING/ FIRST BASE / ASSIST COACH.. ANY ONE BEFORE 2014..
..

Anonymous said...

THAT IS PITCHING COACH / ALL LA COACHES BEFORE 2014 IF THE OWNERS WISE UP..

THE LOSING ERA... TO A NEW ERA OF WINNING AND EXCELLENCE.....

NOT DO WITH WHAT YOU HAVE...AND TRY TO SALVAGE EVERYONE YOU CAN!!!

The Ghost of Steve Jobs said...

My apologies! Siri has discovered your blog, she is drunk AND she is stuck in all CAPS!