Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Yankeetorial: Soon, we will learn just how much Hal Steinbrenner has come to loathe his father's favorite toy

The NBA announced yesterday that Knicks owner Jim Dolan - the veritable human definition of incompetence - won't face punishment for telling off a fan in an angry email, saying the great and mighty Knicks - currently 10-42 on the season, and 25 games out - don't want him.

Soon, Hal Steinbrenner can get the same reaction out of the entire NY Yankee fan base. And he won't even have to press "SEND."

Soon, Yoan Moncada, this winter's last tempting free agent, will sign with somebody. For the last three months, Hal has sat on his tightly zippered purse, as every major auction came and went. He simply clutched his coins and pointed to A-Rod, saying, "Blame him!" Hal said fiscal prudence will restore the Yankees to their former prominence... of 15 years ago.

Coincidentally, the Steinbrenners will bank all that money the team saves. 

And, amazingly, the Yankiverse seems inclined to let him get away with it.

Insert sigh here.

Yesterday, the "Evil Empire" - (ah, remember when we were an "empire?") - watched as San Diego signed James Shields, a pitcher who might have propelled the 2015 Yankees to spring respectability. The Padres got him for $75 million over four years - chickenfeed, compared to what the Yankees doled out last year for our Three Stooges, Bri, Carl and Jac. It's hard to imagine George Steinbrenner letting Shields go for so little. Then again, George never played the owners' game of poor-mouthing. (The players union called it "collusion.") 

Still, Moncada remains unsigned. He is 19, a switch-hitter, and he might even play SS. He is the last domino to drop on this brutally long winter of Yankee discontent.

In the next few days, Moncada will come off the board. That means Hal can throw up his hands and lament that no 19-year-old is worth so much money. And the clown courtiers of the NYC media will agree - because, hey, that's how calls get returned.

Or... Hal can belly up to the bar, pull out his infinitely thick stack of bills, and buy us one stiff shot of hope - something in which to believe, as this stinker of a team unfurls itself. 

The last two Yankee teams - known for Lyle Overbay and Yangervis Solarte - entered their seasons already dead. This will be the third. This winter, we basically rearranged the deck chairs. We remain a year away from any meaningful influx of youth - that is, if any is coming. Track records being what they are, there is reason to wonder if help is truly on the way.  

It is time for Hal to unzip his precious purse. The snow outside our doors is two feet high. We need some ray of hope. We don't need to spend the next month watching a billionaire pull out his pockets, poor-mouthing and blaming A-Rod.

I'd rather get an email telling me where to go. 


John M said...

Old George is turning in his grave. Probably in one of those snazzy pinstriped and logoed Yankee Subarus, unless Hal downgraded him to a golf cart.

Remember when relief pitchers used to come in on a golf cart? Nobody does that now. Why did they ever do it in the first place?

I mean, golf carts cost money. Every owner knows that.

Tom said...

Besides the reluctance to bet big, the Yankees won't even give their own prospects a chance to make it or break it. Instead, we got the endless conga line of yesterday's glamor boys, and our former prospects move on, leading to small items like this from Atlanta:
Almonte impresses: Outfielder Zoilo Almonte, a former Yankees prospect whom the Braves signed as a free agent, finished second in the Dominican Republic winter league batting race with a .338 average (and .395 OBP) in 35 games. Almonte feasted against right-handers, batting .360 (31-for-86) with 11 doubles, two homers and a .973 OPS. He could begin the season in a left-field platoon with veteran Jonny Gomes, another offseason signee.
But the Yankees couldn't use this guy because they had to spend big on Andruw Jones/Vernon Wells/Carlos Beltran and their mostly useless ilk. Total lack of imagination, courage and competence.

KD said...

If we pass on Moncada and go Mets dumpster diving for Bartolo Colon, I am finished. I mean it. Really. I'm done!

Oh, I'm not fooling anyone, am I?

Anonymous said...

I can't remember a time when the Yankees, Giants, and Knicks were all so awful. Thank God for Odell Beckham Jr.

Anonymous said...

love your blog. but, uh, could you please, please, please stop using the guy with boom box pic!