Wednesday, December 19, 2018

It's Manny Day, and the future of the Yankees is at stake

Yogi Berra once said, "When you come to a fork in the road, take it."

Today, the Yankees hit that fork in the road.

Manny Machado is coming for a chat.  

He'll sit down with Brian Cashman. They'll start by lamenting the cold weather - (it's winter, you know) - and the traffic, and the malls, and the cab drivers, and all the shopping they still must do before Christmas. Manny will tell a story about the blight in Baltimore, and Cash will match it with one about White Plains. Talk will turn to the Kardashians, Springsteen on Broadway, Ariana Grande, the Chilling Adventures of Sabrina and other topics that - when added to an internet post - are likely to draw outside clicks. Then, abruptly, the small talk will end. Each man will lean forward and stare into the other's eyes for 30 long seconds. At that point, they will either fight or fuck.

This is it, the fulcrum day for the future of humankind.

If conversation soars, if the minds meld, and if the numbers line up, Machado could become a Yankees fixture for the next decade. For better or worse.

If talks go sideways, if the franchise's public poor-mouthing is real, rather than a negotiating tactic, both sides will take different routes. For better or worse.

I cannot list all the ramifications of this today. It's beyond my capabilities. Hinging upon these discussions are the assorted fates of Miguel Andujar, Didi Gregorius, Clint Frazier, Aaron Boone, Giancarlo Stanton, Cashman, global warming, gun control, the stock market, Robert Mueller... maybe even Bryce Harper. The impact will cascade throughout the Yankee system, from Randy Levine's golden office urinal down to the pitted infields of Charleston and Pulaski... to the empty ballpark where Troy Tulowitski worked out yesterday before a smattering of scouts, and along the Canyon of Heroes, which could resound with future parades - or remain silent for the rest of our lives.

There are two Yankiverses - one with Manny, one without him. And the most maddening part of this day is quite simple: 

I don't know which I prefer.

But I do know this. This is no day to celebrate the signing of Scranton bullpen lug nut Rex Brothers, or to ponder the likelihood of Jacoby Ellsbury ever playing in another game, or whether Gary Sanchez is learning how to block pitches. They are inconsequential matters.

Today, I am hereby calling for a freeze on all speculation concerning pitchers and catchers. Whatever we think doesn't matter. Because tomorrow - or sometime soon - the Yankiverse as we know it will be newly defined.  

Folks, this is Manny Day. We have reached the fork in the road. We have no choice but to follow Yogi's instructions. It's time to take it. For better or worse.

15 comments:

Worm on Tongue said...

I await with baited breath!

13bit said...

We can all have fun. I LOVE MANNY! I HATE MANNY! I DON'T CARE ABOUT MANNY!

It's all relatively meaningless - until it's not, of course, and he's either the next Babe Ruth or the next Joginson Cano. It's just conversation. Blog fodder.

The really important stuff is what Duque just put a ban on discussing - pitchers and catchers. Really, until we get some talent in the system and on the big club, everything else is just hypothetical bloviation and fantasy material.

We have no staff. Screw Manny. Sign Manny and Bryce! It doesn't matter. You can get as many homers as Baby Buddha but, if you can't stop the other team from scoring, it's all for naught.

I wish I could get a helping of those garlic fries from the Stadium - my body could use a colon cleanse. Wait! I take that back. Don't want to tempt the gods. Everything is fine as it stands.

I can't wait to find Manny wrapped up in a huge dollar bill under our Christmas tree. Holiday Tree? Is that better.

Anonymous said...

THIS IS SO STRANGE, IT REALLY IS....

WE HAVE AN INCREDIBLY TALENTED PLAYER WHO SAYS HE WANTS TO PLAY WITH US, BUT WANTS THE "OPTION" ON HUSTLING.

WHEN SOMEONE TALKS LIKE THAT, YOU REALLY HAVE TO WONDER IF HE WANTS US TO ACCEPT WINNING AS AN "OPTION" TOO?

.....AND THERE IS THE ISSUE OF GETTING RID OF ANDUJAR (WHICH I FIND INSANE) IF WE SIGN HIM.

WHY CAN'T WE JUST BE HAPPY ABOUT GETTING THIS GUY?

SONOFABITCH...

Anonymous said...

13,

"I wish I could get a helping of those garlic fries from the Stadium"

Based on what I read this week that might not have been garlic on the fries.

To the Manny situation. An informal put up or shut up poll:

1) No Manny period. Take money get Harper.
2) No Manny period. Take money and spread it around.
2) No Manny period Take money get "the position that must not be named"
3) Get Manny but only for a "reasonable" 250M. More than that, no.
4) Get Manny for whatever it takes and we're done.
5) Get Manny and Harper for whatever it takes. Trade AnDUjar as part of a
package for a number one player at that position we're not allowed to talk
about.
6) Get Manny and Harper don't trade anyone and do John M's "Let G-d sort it
out"

They have the money! Manny and Harper are great! Great! That's why the conversation is about 300M each. We have the money! More than any other team. The Red Sox must be destroyed. Let's scare teams again! Let's put more legends in the books and in monument park.

So for me, let's do a Patrick McGoohan. Number six! Number six! Number six!

Doug K.

TheWinWarblist said...

FUCKERS!!FUCKERS!!FUCKERS!!FUCKERS!!FUCKERS!!FUCKERS!!FUCKERS!!FUCKERS!!FUCKERS!!FUCKERS!!

Joe Formerlyof Brooklyn said...


"Carthago delenda est." -- Cato the Elder, in the 200s BCE

"The Red Sox must be destroyed." Doug K, 2018 CE

Who could argue?

I'm Bill White said...

If Manny is the future of the Yankees then Ghosts of Yankees Past are turning in their graves like rotisserie chicken. Like rotisserie chicken from which expert chefs cut the choicest slabs of meat at Food Action Stations located throughout Yankee Stadium. Nothing says Yankee Baseball like Yankee Stadium Rotiserie Chicken.

13bit said...

I like this poll. I am fine with numbers 1 or 6.

Anonymous said...

I LOVE #6.

I WONDER WHAT HAPPENS IF I HAVE THE GARLIC FRIES WITH A JACK AND COKE?

PROBABLY ANAL LEAKAGE.

Anonymous said...

Man, I love good garlic fries; doesn't sound like the ones at YS III are it, though.

I would also be happy with #s 1 or 6, above. LB (No J)

Anonymous said...

I'm on the 1 or 6 wagon, too. But we should've signed Corbin. Who does something we can't talk about. Money should've gone there. And THEN we sign Manny and Bryce. And Robertson and Britton. And Saccho and Venzetti. And Leopold and Loeb.

If only Burns and Allen were still available.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Anon, it's the rat feces that give the garlic fries that special something.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Folks, you outdid yourselves with this one. References to Patrick McGoohan in "The Prisoner," Cato the Elder, and Leopold and Loeb (not to mention Burns and Allen) IN THE SAME CHAIN???

This is the most erudite Yankees blog, EVER!

SUCK IT, River Ave Blues and Yanks Go Yard! (In the Christmas spirit, that is.)

Carl J. Weitz said...

Number Six: Where am I?
Number Two: In the Village.
Number Six: What do you want?
Number Two: Information.
Number Six: Whose side are you on?
Number Two: That would be telling. We want information… information… information.
Number Six: You won't get it.
Number Two: By hook or by crook, we will.
Number Six: Who are you?
Number Two: The new Number Two.
Number Six: Who is Number One?
Number Two: You are Number Six.
Number Six: I am not a number! I am a free man!
Number Two: [laughs]

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