Thursday, June 4, 2020

Virtual Baseball: Yanks Sink Mariners Again, Take Fourth Straight Series. DL Still On Lam.

J.A. Happ returned to form today in Seattle, throwing seven strong innings as the Yankees routed the Mariners, 7-2, taking their fourth straight series.  There Estrada and Brett Gardner each homered, in a relatively limited parade of roundtrips by the Yanks.  D.J. LeMahieu also hit a two-run triple, and started three double-plays at second base.

As the Yanks jetted home to New York, though, their disabled list remained at large, hidden somewhere in the secret compound that contains the Goop Lab, reputedly somewhere near the SAC Command deep in the Rocky Mountains.

As FBI agents, accompanied by Lonn Trost and Randy Levine, combed the mountain trails, the vast number of injured Yankees players remained at large and, presumably, gooped up.

What their ultimate fate will be can only be guessed.  But one thing all experts agree on is that it can scarcely be worse than that to be expected at the hands of the Yankees' crack training staff.  


JM said...

I have this weird image of Charlton Heston being carried out of a crowded room of dystopian types, screaming, "Goop is poop!"

The lockdown, the protests, the looting, it's all getting to me.

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