Judge and Volpe, Schmidt and Goldy: Our meaningless worries keep piling up

Freddie Mercury said it best: Nothing really matters... Not Scaramouche. Not Galileo. Not Cody Bellinger - even if he do the Fandango. A box score on March 18, regardless of the circumstances, carries no atomic weight or matter in the pantheon of Yankee experience. 

Any way the wind blows... right?

That said...

1. On the spring, Aaron Judge is 2-for-20 with 11 strikeouts. You could say, cruelly, that he's reached postseason form. He looks awful, trying to hit each ball into the Gulf of Mexico America Measles.  

I'm not worried. Nope. Not a whit. In fact, I'm not sure why I bothered to note it here. He'll be fine. Ha ha! O, maybe he'll dilly-dally, get off to a slow start, go hitless for a week or two. He'll be fine. FINE. DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME? HE. WILL. BE. FINE. GODDAMMIT. He just needs plate appearances. Which is why he sat out yesterday, right? Fine. 

2. This winter, folks wondered which Anthony Volpe we'd see in 2025 - the '23 version, who swings hard (21 HRs and .209) or the '24 model, who puts bats on balls (12 HRs, .243.)  

Thus far, we're seeing the free-swinger: 5-for-36, .139, with 2 HRs and 13 strikeouts. Yikes. Joey Gallo?

This is a change from past Volpean springs. In 2023, he famously rode a .309 Grapefruit average into starting SS on opening day. Last spring, he hit .314, prompting Aaron Boone to install him as leadoff hitter. Both springs led to underachieving summers. This year, the reverse? Bad spring, hot summer? Let's hope. Because now and then, when I glance at Volpe, I get a momentary feeling that I'm seeing Tommy DeVito. It rattles me. 

3. Yesterday, Clarke Schmidt was scratched from action with a sore shoulder. It was described as a "setback" from his injury woes. 

Listen: This is not a setback. Schmidt had been recovering from lower back pain. This is the shoulder, buckos. This is the enchilada. Schmidt would be the third starting pitcher lost this spring. We're already down to Carlos Carrasco, who was sorta a joke when they signed him last month. This is the shoulder. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

4. Speaking of bad backs, Paul Goldschmidt has entered the chat. He took himself out yesterday after feeling pain in the old lumbago. The 37-year-old says not to worry: Were this the regular season, he'd be playing. 

Why do they always say that? Are we supposed to be soothed? 

5. The newly hulked-up Ben Rice has 4 HRs, now tied with Trent Grisham for the team lead! At least something to be hopeful about, right? 

So, nothing really matters? Say that to Big Ben.