Time to break glass: Boston has tied the Yankees in the loss column

Hear ye, hear ye... Let it be known that the '26 Yankees lasted as a viable contender through Aug. 5, beyond the garage sale liquidations. Remember the hopes, the expectations, the illusions of spring? back when the sap was running, the trees were greening, and Boston's vaunted youth movement looked D.O.A? 

Yep, I remember April. The Redsocks won on opening day, then lost eight of nine. They couldn't hit. They couldn't field. Marcelo Mayer was hurt. Roman Anthony was sloppy. They fired Joey Cora and his suck-ups. They were done, the season an official shit show. 

Meanwhile, the Yankees won seven of their first eight, roaring from the gates, and awaiting the return of Gerrit Cole and Carlos Rodon. It was a Yankee year. Remember how easily, how gullibly, we chased the bait? 

Hook, line and sinker.

Welp, turn your head and cough. It's over. This plane don't fly.; this lineup don't score. Judge and Giancarlo were optical illusions. We're down to Luis Garcia Jr. and Heliot Ramos - with a disturbing Willie Calhoun/Franchie Cordero vibe. We've returned to bullpen meltdowns and the terrifying emptiness of a batter coming up with runners in scoring position. 

We saw it again last night, against St. Louis - a tomato can that won two of three in our home park. 

We're now tied with Boston in the loss column. Our next defeat - probably Friday night - will bring a giant WHOOSH, the sound that comes with settling into third. From there, our lone relief will be the astounding mediocrity of the AL. From there, we'll simply need to stay above .500, which is Brian Cashman's great skill. 

In the race for that final wild card slot - and let's face it, that's been our objective all along - the Yankees lead Texas and Cleveland (both at 57-58) by eight games. And you can see Cashman's pipe dream:  Get Judge and Giancarlo back, have Schlittler and Cole ready, and fortify the bullpen with Weathers and Warren. Unfortunately, it's a mirage. In this universe, there is no such thing as the Yankees at full strength.  

Nope. You can feel the rumbling. Today's Gray Lady has a thumb-sucker about how stressful it is to be Cashman, with a fan base the doesn't appreciate him, the master of finishing above .500. You can feel the forces lining up to defend him, to extend him, the poor Yankee executive who always delivers a winner. 

Royals fans would be thankful. You wouldn't hear Rockies fans complaining. Why can't Yank fans appreciate what they have? 

Sadly, the Yankees used to be baseball's best team. No, check that: They were America's best sports team. Wait, no: They were the best in the world. They were the New York Fucking Yankees. 

Whoosh.