TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT

TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT
Tonight's moon phase: WANING CRESCENT

FIFTY THOUSAND MOONS

Sunday, May 12, 2013

Resolved, unanimously: Vernon Wells is the New York Yankees' starting left fielder

Republican or Democrat, Vegan or Carnivore, Peanut Butter or Jelly - whatever your inclination - tonight, let us unite as obnoxious Yankee fans in one mighty chorus: Altogether, everybody:

"VERNON WELLS IS OUR LEFT-FIELDER, AND HE IS BATTING THIRD."

Note: This will not change when a certain Man of Grandeur emerges from the fracking ponds of Pennsylvania.  This will not change when the Rod of A-Hip slithers up from Florida, or when Tex or the Captain, or even Tennille arrives. This will only change when Vernon Wells decides he isn't the Yankee left-fielder, batting third.

I was wrong on Vernon Wells. We all were. Could he be the player version of Joe Torre - the guy who looked tanked until he reached the Yankees? Two months ago, Wells was run out of LA with the Angels paying half his tab, headed to a Yankee fan-base that viewed his presence as the ultimate sign of the Yankees impending apocalypse.

Well, he's hit, fielded and stolen bases - been every bit the player he was once projected to be. Last year, Wells hit 11 home runs. Today, he hit No. 9. He could hit 40 this season, passing 300 on his career. If he can be a Bill Robinson - that is, put together four late solid seasons - (he's 34) - Wells could finish with 450 HR and go into Cooperstown. Players with less original talent have done it.

Of course, that's crap conjecture. This is real: Neither Grandy, Gardner nor Ichiro is going to send the RH-hitting Wells to our bench. He is batting third. For my money, that shouldn't change when Tex or Arod come back - because he's been doing it in the clutch. 

It's early. Yankee fans still have a psychosomatic Andruw Jones impulse: They saw a player show signs of re-emerging - and then start swinging for the fences in every at bat, until there was nothing left but a strikeout machine. (It might have happened to Grandy, too.) It could happen to Wells. It's up to him. But damn - he could be Cashman's greatest career acquisition. Vernon Wells! Yankee cap in Cooperstown? I like it!

10 comments:

SanJoseKid said...

So I am commenting to my wife that Vernon Wells has surprised virtually everyone and been reborn in Yankee Stadium. She chided, "Now aren't you sorry that you said those things about him?" "No", I replied, "the criticism motivated him to prove the fans wrong . . . . It's all JuJu, Baby." Now that The Replacements are The Starters, here's a wake-up call to Tex, Grandy, Pay-Rod, and the whole gang. I like Granderson a lot, but can he play third base? Let us remember that once upon a time Yogi Berra played left field on a regular basis. Look it up.

John M said...

But you know what will happen when Grandy and Tex are up to playing speed. You know, because the Yankees never put production over a gazillion dollar contract. They want stars on the field, brother, whether or not they bump guys having great years or even great streaks.

And Joe G will say something like, 'You can't have a player the caliber of Grandy/Tex and not play him.' He will then show that given Wells' questionable performance against left-handed screwballers and Grandy's ability to hit right-handers' Folly Floaters in July, the numbers prove that Grandy is the man. And the numbers are always right, in the sense that your butt is covered and you get a contract extension while Vernon Love and Lyle Overachiever get picked up by Cleveland.

It's the Yankee way. You know. Moronic.

Bill Robinson, OF said...

Thanks for reminding everybody that I once wore pinstripes for the most storied franchise in sports. I'll send you one of my baseball cards, Duque.

Leinstery said...

The chosen one has finally revealed himself. We thought it could be Murcer, Bernie was the closest, but Vernon Wells is the true successor to the Mick.

THE BRONX IS VERNON

coolnewyorker said...

Vernon is just one of those acquisitions who thrive in pinstripes. He has good company: Tino M, Scot B, Paul O', and hopefully Ichiro S.

A voice from the Lowe's Broadcast Booth said...

Agreed, coolnewyorker, but let us not forget the Yankee great who left the pine trees of Georgia to discover his destiny in the Bronx: JOHN STERLING.

Leinstery said...

^^ thank you for reminding me about this little diddy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mk8HragXd0A
Seriously everybody watch it, it'll get your dick hard. Just two New York broadcast legends in their early days. The hawks didn't know that their farm system would go on to produce two cornball hall of famers.

And I was going to say that it all makes sense now, but then I realized that we are now faced with a chicken or the egg dilemma. Did John learn how to rhyme Home run calls under the master of Jive talking Walt "Clyde" Frazier, or did Clyde learn hone his style under the tutelage of a man some would call God?

joe de pastry, who thought getting wells was ridiculous said...

Bench Suzuki.

Alphonso said...

Slow down, everyone.

True, Vernon has been amazing in every respect.

But, even Duque recently opined this ( I think ), "wait until August." Then rave and make your hall of fame comments, if he is playing as he is now.

It can happen.

The key is to give him a day off every 4-5 games. That should become Granderson's role. Same for Ichiro and Gardy.

If Joe does this ( starting Granderson mostly against righties, please ), Vernon and the others can hold up.

I say the same for Texiera, if he ever plays again. He should be Lyle's substitute 2-3 games per week. Tex is now a bench player.

coolnewyorker said...

Forget it, guys. Any pinstriper in the same mold as of Wells, Brosius, Tino Martinez, etc. will thrive, no matter what... just as long as he wears Yanks uniform.

Gladly for Wells, he will not experience being unpinstriped, like Tino did because he retires after stint in the Bronx.

Players like Tino Martinez languish in other uniform after thriving in Yank's. Others just retired.

I am convinced Swisher is in the same mold. I am watching him. So far not so bad.