It drew reporters the way a melted popsicle attracts ants. Naturally, the brotherhood of the brood noted how A-Rod is old, feeble and no longer worth all that money the Steinbrothers foisted upon him several years ago. And they noticed his big shiny car.
Yes, his car. If A-Rod ever saves a baby from a burning building, they'll write about the car. (After questioning what he was doing there.) Some excerpts from yesterday:
Times: [He] arrived with a driver in a Cadillac Escalade. And minutes after his arrival, someone else drove his black Maybach 57S into the lot... The fact that only Rodriguez chose to stand and sign autographs at the gates of the facility while photographers clicked away gave off the appearance of a somewhat calculated public relations move.
NY Post: Rodriguez got into his Maybach, a vehicle that sells for about $416,000, and was off —
Newsday: As soon as A-Rod began doing things on a baseball field -- as he did Monday, fenced off from reporters and passersby -- the Yankees got dragged back into his drama-filled existence all over again.
MLB.com: He showed up in a white sweater and khaki pants, and left about three hours later in his Maybach 57 S...
I know, I know, I know... it's just details, it's just sportswriters, it's just A-Rod... the planet's most overpaid and indefensible human being, after Charlie Sheen and Donald Trump. And last year, the International Congress of Yankee Fans passed a resolution mandating that all public references to A-Rod include:
1. A brief list of the players we could sign if not for A-Rod's contract.
2. The fact that he'll never hit like he did.
3. That, except for the 2009 post-season, he never hit in the clutch.
4. He hangs with floozies.
5. He uses big words and thinks he's really smart.
6. He must have been juicing. How else would his name appear on a notepad in that Miami clinic?
7. The Yankees secretly hope he never comes back.
8. If MLB can ban him, George's boys might escape paying him.
9. Even if acts humble, he's not fooling us.
10. He drives a shiny, fancy car. He thinks he's big.
Listen: They're all egomaniacs. The all drive gas-guzzlers. They all hang with bimbos. They all read their clippings. The smart ones act humble, but they're not.
You pay your money, and you get to boo. You buy the paper, and you get to read what the sportswriter thinks. But one question for the Yankiverse, and I hope we don't overlook it.
Is it right to blame a guy for growing old?
Is it right to boo a guy for being hurt?
OK, sorry. That's two questions. Didn't mean to get complicated. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm taking my Maybach 57S to Aldis to buy a can of dogfood.