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Saturday, January 14, 2017

Architect of "repealing and replacing" Yankee Stadium tapped to guard America's Interweb thingy

High-tech wiz will clean up Interweb
Sixteen years ago, Rudy Giuliani became a national fixture, sitting in the first base box seats, yelling at baseball's last great team, the New York fucking Yankees. This happened in a ballpark that Rudy was working to raze. More than any other political oil can, he brought us the new Yankee Stadium, with its magnificent disco and $3,000 seats.

Sixteen years. Hard to believe, eh? Throughout that period, Rudy constantly ran for President. At one point, his own top cop, Bernie Kerik, was tapped to be U.S. Director of Homeland Security, though he ended up in prison for felony tax fraud. Rudy - "America's Mayor" - never left the national Fox News stage, and his undying loyalty remains a defining part of Yankee Conservative Republican lore. Fun fact: Randy Levine once worked for him.

Now, at 72, Rudy faces his final marquee role: He'll do what Trump calls "cyber." He'll keep America from being hacked. It's perfect: To fight hacking, get a hack! I can picture Rudy on the job: "Okay now, where is the mouse? Is this the cookie? Why isn't this opening my hotmail? Uh-oh. Did I do something? The thing isn't blinking. CompuServe never did this, not once. I hate these things!" 

Of course, it's patronage. Trump threw him a bone. And yeah, the Dems are no better. Still, this has a brilliantly devilish component, a form of creative chaos. After all, Trump made Ben Carson - an obvious Surgeon General candidate - the head of HUD, of which he knows nothing. And het's giving Rudy - who surely knows a thing or two about urban administration - a job in computer security. I guess NASA had no openings?

I get it that this is politics, as usual. I just thought they'd find something less nakedly craven. My bad.

28 comments:

Anonymous said...

WHEN RUDY TOOK OFF THAT HALF MET/HALF YANKEE HAT IN 2000 ON NATIONAL TV, AND THREW IT AWAY TO PUT ON HIS OWN TRUSTY YANKEE HAT, IT WAS NOTHING BUT LOVE I HAD FOR RUDY......NOT TO MENTION HE WAS BEING THE BEST MAYOR THE CITY HAS EVER SEEN........OUR PRESIDENT ELECT LEARNED A THING OR TWO FROM RUDY....HE WORKED TIRELESSLY IN OFFICE, TOTALLY CLEANED UP THE CITY (WHICH NOW HAS BEEN STUNK UP AGAIN, LITERALLY-YOU CAN ACTUALLY SMELL URINE IN SOME CITY STREETS- UNDER BILL DEBLAISIO) AND DURING AND AFTER 911, HE KEPT FLYING FROM CITY TO CITY (SHOWING UP TO THE YANKEE GAME IN ARIZONA AT NIGHT, THEN RETURNING THE NEXT DAY TO HELP NEW YORK HEAL- THIS WENT ON THE ENTIRE SERIES......THAT'S LEADERSHIP.....

el duque said...

What does Rudy know about cyber-terrorism, beyond that it's bad?

Is it too much to ask that they actually get a person with a working knowledge of high-tech security to run the show? If you're bent on giving Rudy a job - as I said, patronage is patronage - how about giving him something that actually draws on his background? Cyber-czar Rudy Giuliani. What a joke.

Joe Formerlyof Brooklyn said...

For the Trump Administrative, Rudy is an Affirmative-Action Hire.

He does not have any billions. Not even one. Probably not even $500 million. For a Trump appointee, he's the ultimate definition of "the other 99.99%."

His ethnic heritage is . . . suspect. Isn't he a Mafia spawn of some sort? He doens't really need SPF 125 protection when the Sun's out, which will save money vs. the other appointees.

He's mentally disabled. In 2010, he said there were no attacks on the USofA during Republican Administrations. Seemed (THEN) to have forgotten all that 9/11/01 unfortunate stuff.

His leadership, while perhaps good earlier (and in front of a microphone), wasn't so strategic. Wasn't it during his time in office that NYC's emergency command-and-control HQ was placed inside the World Trade Center? (which had already been attacked once, in 1993, by Osama's minions.....)

And of course, for Trump, who is a Queensite, Rudy's rooting for the Yankees makes the administration that much more diverse -- doesn't it?

JJ in MA said...

To pretend NYC didn't smell like piss at any point in history is delusional. Part of the character of the city.

Anonymous said...

DOES ANYBODY REALLY BELIEVE A MAN LIKE RUDY GUILIANI AFTER ALL HIS YEARS IN OFFICE, DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO USE A COMPUTER IN THIS DAY AND AGE?........C'MON NOW......AND I WOULDN'T DOUBT HE MAY KNOW A LOT MORE ABOUT CYBER TERRORISM THAN WE THINK.

Anonymous said...

The real Bro-mance you ought to be having, then, all-caps, is NOT with Rude-y - - but rather with his beloved Commish, Bernie Kerik (now that he's out of jail): May have been under Rude-y's hors-d'oeuvres, but Bernie is the one who was really the scourge of all winos, squee-gee men, and homeless people. Big man!! Big bully!! Pick on those less fortunate, why don'cha'?? Like his new boss, the Rude One only has compassion for other wealthy men - - certainly none for any women: how classy can you get, dumping your current wife in a press-conference?? BOTH the Rude One and the Orange-tufted Buffoon did that....(see the story in the Daily News from yesterday on how the latter planted a story anonymously by calling into the Daily News' editor).

Only one who's beat that for compassion & feeling toward a significant other: the inimitable Newt Grinch-Rich - - who dumped one of his three wives while she was recovering from surgery, in the hospital....but let's give those two above a chance - - maybe they'll yet top the Newtster in the cruelty to women department....

Every time I see Rude-y in the Yankee-hat, it just makes me want to blow chunks.

....and, yeah, I bet the Rude-ster is at LEAST the 100 millionth-most-qualified person on cyber-security - - after a bunch of 9 y/o kids, a couple of intelligent cats (see the cute GIFs in the WashPo, about 3 days a week), and a 400-pound man sitting on the edge of his bed. Boo-Yah LB (no J)

Anonymous said...

I believe that anyone who believes anything Rudy Giuliani has to say is less than informed. He was more than happy to go to other daily news shows and spread the mis-information, lies, told by the Trump squad. Rudy would've taken the trash out at the White House, had that been offered. Rudy's claims of the GOP somehow keeping the United states safer, is disingenuous at best. The fact is, 9/11 occurred during a GOP administration, and Osama bin Laden was killed under a Democratic administration. Trump will have his own Oval Office scandal, ala Bill Clinton, when he blows Vladimir Putin in the same office. Thank you, el duque.

Anonymous said...

This site has been such a welcome refuge from politics and the current Constitutional crisis that it's a shame to see an anonymous moron entering the fray. When Duque talks about politics, nobody minds because he's even-handed and funny. When a misinformed rube typing in all caps goes on an emotional, non-fact-based rant like a little girl from Missouri, it's UGLY. I'm posting this anonymously, as well, even though I usually show my screen identity, just to demonstrate what such cowardice looks like. Can we keep it to baseball here in the comments and let Duque and his gang say whatever they like? If not, I'm happy to engage with blockheads, but it's such a waste of time.

Anonymous said...

Rudy has been running a highly respected global cyber security company for a number of years now. His legal background as a lawyer / prosecutor, his company's expertise in global cyber security, and his close working relationship with Trump make him a perfect choice for this role. Plus, he's a grown up with a backbone.

Anonymous said...

anonymous....(NOT THE LAST ANONYMOUS, WHO MADE SENSE ABOUT RUDY'S BACKBONE, THE ONE WHO LOVES HIS "WAR" IN BASEBALL..LOL).....I ALWAYS TRY TO BE NICE TO YOU, BUT.....DON'T BE SUCH A DOUCHEBAG......SOME PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD RESPECT RUDY (AND BELIEVE IT OR NOT, OUR NEXT PRESIDENT).......SO MANY ARE ACTING LIKE NO ONE VOTED IN THIS LATEST ELECTION.....THEY DID VOTE...... THEY WANT CHANGE..... THEY GOT CHANGE..... GIVE TRUMP A CHANCE, HE ALREADY IS WORKING TIRELESSLY AND NO MATTER HOW YOU WANT TO SPIN IT, HAS ALREADY SAVED JOBS IN THIS COUNTRY WITHOUT BEING INAUGURATED YET!....I GUESS THAT DOESN'T MATTER RIGHT?.....NOTHING HE DOES MATTERS......LETS JUST ALL KNOCK, AND KNOCK, AND TEAR HIM DOWN, RIGHT?.....UNBELIEVABLE!

el duque said...

Knock it off, everybody. When they see us fighting among ourselves, they're laughing at Fenway.

Anonymous said...

NO DISRESPECT EVER TO YOU MR. DUQUE.......BUT I DON'T HAVE TO TAKE CRAP JUST BECAUSE I HAVE OPPOSING OPINIONS...... I NEVER INSULTED ANYONE OF THE BLOGGERS ON HERE BEFORE (I WOULDN'T).....UNTIL I WAS STRUCK FIRST.

el duque said...

I accept that, and I love your comments on the Yankees. We happen to disagree on Trump, and we have to rise above it and not taking anything personal. If it turns out that I'm wrong, and Trump works wonders on this country, I will gratefully apologize. If things go South for Trump - really, I hope I'm wrong - then I and others will be working to bring you back into the light. Listen: All we're trying to do here is save each other's soul. And of course, win number 28. Actually, on second thought, fuck you all and your hell-bent souls. I just want number 28.

Anonymous said...

Rude-y was invited into that firm, basically, for his NAME - - and for the contacts he could bring to the firm. If you actually believe that he has anything to do with the more technical end of cyber-security, I have a baseball team I would be interested in selling - - they play about maybe 150 miles or so from the Yanks, and some of them tawk funny - - but, hey - - they fill their rotten old park to the gills, pretty much every day....I'm tired of taking in all that money - - maybe you could get Rude-y to kick in on the deal. LB (no J)

el duque said...

From now on, all arguments must be conducted in the manner that they will be done in the White House.

In Russian.

By the way, you know the difference between a lentil and a chickpea?

You don't let a lentil on your face.

Anonymous said...

Brilliant-sky, Duque-Narodny!! Aprelvsky Gramplastinnok i Zabod. Do Svidanya!
LB (No J)

John M said...

I've been actually living in New York City for over 30 years now. Rudy did a very good job during his first term as mayor. By the last half of his second, he was a control freak who (relatively) didn't have anything left to do, so he became a royal pain in the butt and generally acted a tad loony, focusing on fairly meaningless details that residents couldn't understand. He was also the genius who ignored the advice of his experts and put the city's emergency command center in the World Trade Center instead of in Brooklyn. After 9/11, we didn't have a command center.

Rudy was a hero of 9/11 because he did his job. He showed up, which was good since the president was nowhere to be seen. When he tried to ride that into presidential politics, us New Yorkers wondered why the rest of the country thought he was at all worth voting for. (Side note...until Rudy endorsed Bloomberg, Bloomie was dead in the water due to the publication of amazingly Trump-like misogynistic crudities he was know for at Bloomberg LLC.)

Rudy has gone on to work in the security industry, so he does probably know something about cybersecurity. At least he had employees who did. I have a feeling he may not have got down into the weeds with that, since the firm had many other security services, all executed by people who were experts in those fields. But whatever.

Strangely, while Mr. Trump has won the hearts and minds of many people, he was a bit of a running joke in New York City since the 80s, at least. Nobody took him very seriously, since he never built much of anything after his dad co-signed the loan so he could borrow money to do his first project. After that, he became a student of Roy Cohn, the infamous right-hand many of Joseph McCarthy, who was a close friend of Trump's for years.

Trump went on to become a great salesman who sold his name, but stopped actually building much. That involved details others were more interested in pursuing. Like with Rudy, a lot of New Yorkers are scratching their heads over how the heartland could vote for Trump, but vote they did. I hope with all sincerity that he and his administration help the people who trust in him and prove beneficial to the country in general. It's just amazing to me to see this result given the "character" and "moral" issues that have disqualified and dogged previous politicians, especially among conservatives and religious folks.

Let's hope this all works out for all our sakes.

Anonymous said...

To CAPS/ANONYMOUS: Trump may be the President-elect, winning the electoral college, but not elected by the people. While I think little of your baseball knowledge, I did not realize that your opinion could mean less to me. Now, I stand corrected. Trump, btw, lost the popular vote by almost THREE MILLION VOTES. (fyi, maybe you don't intend to insult anyone, however, you have. Both past, and present.)

John M, very well written.

Anonymous said...

YEAH YEAH YEAH anonymous, WHATEVER.......YOU'RE THE GENIUS IN EVERYTHING FROM BASEBALL TO POLITICS, TO BLOG CRITIQUING.

Anonymous said...

To ANONYMOUS, yeah, yeah, yeah.......this isn't a Beatles blogsite. Everyone recognizes you for the idiot that YOU ARE.

Local Bargain Jerk said...


Fuck you all and your hell-bent souls. I just want number 28.

That's a T Shirt if ever there was one.


Anonymous said...

YOU GUYS ARE F@CKED UP.....LOL.....BUT THAT'S WHY I LIKE IT HERE!

Anonymous said...

HEY anonymous.......I ASKED YOU NICELY TO STOP BEING A DOUCHEBAG.....BUT YOU DIDN'T LISTEN.......... THIS IS ACTUALLY HILARIOUS.....ALL I DID IN MY FIRST POST WAS SAY SOMETHING POSITIVE ABOUT RUDY GUILIANI......AND EVERYONE GOT "HELL BENT" AND BENT OUT OF SHAPE....THINK ABOUT THAT....... GROW UP GUYS.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Lighten up Francis!

LBJ you are 100% spot on!

Duque- I don't know Russian, but love their websites.

Here's one of my favorites:

thepeoplescube.com

Rufus T. Firefly said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Alphonso said...

I knew the woman Rudy was banging while he was mayor. That's the best thing I can say about Rudy, and I lived here throughout his reign.

And don't tell me Rudy doesn't know technology. I happen to know he ordered three Smith Corona typewriters for his office. That he does not know how to change the ribbon is hardly material.

Who is it, by the way, that is crawling around the sidewalks of New York smelling urine?

And can you tell Retriever urine from Collie urine?

What Yankee wore #28?

Alphonso said...

Just as an aside; Rudy's job with that security firm was purely for " political patronage," not for knowledge in the field. There is nothing wrong with that. It is a " name on the door," and a reason to get people of influence, "to take phone calls."

And Rudy did have contacts ( Bernard Kerick, for example, before he was prosecuted ) both in New York State and Washington. He was paid for that.

He did know how to order people around. But, truthfully, I can do that. And if I can do it....

nunruid7 said...

I agree that if you plan to stay with a cheater don't try to find any information. However, in my case I needed it in my state in order to file for a divorce and come out of the relationship. You can't just say I think courts want proof or you end up spending a lot of time and money to fight it out! Finding out was hard, but I was relieved that I wasn't crazy and it's making my divorce go a lot smoother. He would never confess; therefore, I did the best thing for me...find out, no doubt, move on!!!contact hotcyberlord@gmail.com.. or text his phone +15402277725 he's a professional and will surely help you out,tell him from Ninah