Ladies and gentlemen, the captain has turned on the seat belt sign, as we are expecting turbulence over the next few miles. Please return to your seats. We will soon be distributing beverages.

For those of you seated on the left side of the aircraft, if you look out the window, you may see flames billowing from the engine. There is no cause for alarm. The Yankee pitching is just overworked. We ask you to lower your window shades, so others will not be disturbed.

For anyone on the right side, it may look as though the wing is missing. Not to worry. Our engineer, Mr. Cashman, is on the phone, looking for a replacement. We are sure he will find one before our descent is further interrupted by the ground.
 
We are, however, offering a special service over the next few minutes. Our flight attendants will be handing out whatever hard liquor you want, free, and we suggest that you take a long, satisfying belt of your favorite elxir, because the ride is going to be bumpy...

So here we are, once again, dancing at .500 - the essence of mediocrity. We have a worse record than the Kansas City Royals. A worse record than the Pittsburgh Pirates. A worse record than the Seattle Mariners. Did you know that Boston - as soon as they finished beating the Yankees - returned to Fenway last night and started losing again?

Not long ago, we stood four games above .500. I thought we were making a run. Nope. It was just a blip, a few wins before the correction.

Now, we face the Perfect Storm: Old players, big contracts, and Cashman seeking deals.

Know what Cashman will get in those deals?

More old players, more big contracts, and more needs to seek deals.

This is how junkies go, day to day, season to season, always seeking that one next fix, which will change their lives. The Yankees are addicted to old players, big contracts, and mid-season deals - which are supposed to solve the problems caused by the old players and the big contracts.

But here is where it gets scary... because everything can turn, not just for 2014 - but through the decade. And here's the view from Cashman's desk, in terms of front office survival (which was always his greatest talent.)

To obtain, say, David Price, all he needs to do is mortgage the future - trade Aaron Judge, Mason Williams, Rob Refsnyder, et al, and tell everybody our scouts had seen flaws in their swings, and they weren't going to be any good. The writers will do the rest. If Price helps the Yankees win, Cashman is a hero and signs a contract extension. If the Yankees lose, why would Cashman care about the lack of prospects next year. That will be his successor's problem. Why make the next guy look good?

I have rooted for the Yankees every single day for more than half a century. But John Sterling is right. You cannot predict anything. I did not believe the 2014 season could be worse than last year. I didn't think it was humanly possible. Now, I'm not so sure. The Yankees are staggering and looking for a big, quick fix. This time, it could be the overdose. We could be headed for a crash. Suggestion: When the stewardess comes by, grab the bottle and don't let go.