Washington _ Drawing historical comparisons to Vietnam and Jose Contreras, President George W. Bush Tuesday said the Yankees must not pull out of Mike Mussina and should continue starting him through 2008.
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"To withdraw will embolden our enemies and increase the chances of inflicting terrible losses, not only on the road, but right here at home," Bush said.
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In his last three starts, Mussina -- 8-10 on the year -- has given up 25 hits and 20 runs (19 earned) over 9 2/3 innings, a 17.69 ERA.
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Bush noted that Mussina's last start against Detroit lasted three innings, nearly twice the distance of his previous performance.
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"That is the kind of progress that does not show up in the daily boxscore," Bush said. "Well, technically, it does show up in the boxscore, but reporters dwell on the negative, especially in New York."
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"To withdraw will embolden our enemies and increase the chances of inflicting terrible losses, not only on the road, but right here at home," Bush said.
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In his last three starts, Mussina -- 8-10 on the year -- has given up 25 hits and 20 runs (19 earned) over 9 2/3 innings, a 17.69 ERA.
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Bush noted that Mussina's last start against Detroit lasted three innings, nearly twice the distance of his previous performance.
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"That is the kind of progress that does not show up in the daily boxscore," Bush said. "Well, technically, it does show up in the boxscore, but reporters dwell on the negative, especially in New York."
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Bush also noted that the left-wing media of the east coast ( and LA + SF ) are too quick to blame repeated failures on those who actually are responsible for them.....e.g.hence,the Presidential defense of Mike Mussina.
In drawing a new parallel to repeated failure and the issue of blame,President Bush noted that Senator Craig's guilty plea to "immoral fun and games" in the men's rooom at the St. Paul airport, had been immediately accepted by the east coast media lefties at face value.
" A declaration of guilt
( particularly when offered as a defense in a public toilet stall ) doesn't mean a thing, " declared the President.
" Don't forget, the media lefties ( and the misguided Americans who made up the jury )once considered Scooter Libby to be guilty and, of course he wasn't," chortled the President.
"And I made it official. I pardoned the sucker, and can do the same for Senator Craig."
After hearing some rather boisterous laughter from the American Legion hall audience, the President stammered into the microphone,"that's just Crawford, Texas slang.
" No offense Dick, I mean Larry, the President added."
And, in an unusual change of focus, the President rhetorically asked, "what are policemen doing in public bathrooms, anyway? I'm going to talk with Churney ( Homeland Security Director and candidate for AG ) and make sure our cops are on the borders, looking for terrorists, not in men's rooms looking for fat, faggot, lying, hypocritical, family -value leading, men of faith Senators."
"The only thing that concerns me," his Eminence added, " is Senator Craig's comment ( and great regret) that this whole matter has left a cloud over Idaho."
What is in that cloud, anyway ? I sure hope those forest fires are out." I sure don't want to lose another red state in a noxious fireball.
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