Future Controversial Comments By Gary Sheffield

"Cats are stupid. I don’t need no cat to tell me how to live. And if the don’t want to come inside, I’m not gonna hold the damn door open for him. Some people do that. They hold the door open and wait for the damn cat. Gary Sheffield doesn’t."
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"I drive for me, not for the car. If I want to get somewhere, I get in the car, and I go there. I don’t give a damn about what the car wants. No car is gonna run my life, because that’s who I am."
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"I get hungry, and that’s when I eat. Gary Sheffield don’t just sit down at a table and eat because some waitress in a tight dress is standing over him, asking what he wants. You tell Gary Sheffield it’s dinner time, and, whoa, little lady! you done started something you just might not wanna finish!"
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"When I go to the toilet, it’s because I gotta go bad. Joe Torre didn’t tell me to go. If Joe Torre says go, some guys just go. They been told to go to the bathroom all their lives, so they go. Me? I say, the only person who tells Gary Sheffield it’s time to go to the bathroom is Gary Sheffield’s little pee-balloon man. And when that guy starts yelping, owwweee, you better believe I listen big."
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"I don’t wash up for no woman. And I don't spray myself. If she don’t like the way Gary Sheffield smells, I put a clothespin on her nose, and I leave it there, because she’s smelling Gary Sheffield, and it don’t get no better than that. I smell myself sometimes. It's better than Joe Torre."