Monday, February 27, 2023

Greta Thunberg should cover the Yankees, because she could sum up the spring message: "Blah-blah-blah..."

Sorry, if I sound cynical. The Death Barge won twice yesterday. They beat the Braves and Jays, playoff contenders, and, apparently, no one tweaked a body part. This should inspire hope or, at least, help to dilute the lingering scent of last October's 0-4 sweep. Begone, ye Ryan McBroom!

The opening of spring training regularly unleashes an avalanche of crapola, and the Yankees yesterday offered split squad snow jobs. 


And on and on. As Greta T would say, "Blah-blah-blah..."

So... what happened yesterday? There is no way to measure meaninglessness. It's all the same. Against the Braves, it looked like this... 

Gleyber is now 4-for-5. (If he has a hot spring, which now seems almost assured, would Cashman trade him?) Deivi Garcia - the ex-Yankee Pedro, now in his last option with the team - threw two shutout innings. (If he looks good, can they get anything in a trade?) Spencer Jones - the next Judge, at least walking off the bus - looked a bit overmatched. Two ABs, two Ks. (Can they rebrand him?) And Clarke Schmidt has a new pitch. He looked unstoppable, unhittable, unbelievable... in other words, blah... blah... blah...

Meanwhile, against Toronto, we saw a team crafted from the Somerset roster...

When you see a lineup that includes Max Burt, you wipe your eyes. I remember a Jim Burt, a DL for the Super Bowl Giants back in 1986. Stud nose-tackle. All pro. This guy, Max, plays 3B, is 26 years old and hit .205 at Double A last year. Was drafted out of college at Northeastern. Max Burt, everybody. Donno if they're related. But how many Burts are out there?

Okay, the big meaningless story: Anthony Volpe went 2-for-4 with two stolen bases. Nice opening, but I shudder to think of the Toronto pitching. (Matt Peacock! The Fernandez boys, Julian and Junior! Hagen Danner!) Most of these guys won't survive the first cuts. In levels of meaninglessness, this is a summit. From here we can almost see across the Atlantic. In fact, I can make out a teenage girl, standing on a mountain. She's waving her hands. She's yelling something. Listen... it sounds like "Blah..." 

11 comments:

ranger_lp said...

As for Volpe, one of those four at-bats was an inning ending groundout double play with the bases loaded...sounds like Yankee material to me...

Jaraxle said...

Volpe stole second on a pitchout, that’s gotta impress you at least a little.

ZacharyA said...

Last year in Spring Training...

Isiah Kiner-Falefa hit .394/.429/.515
Josh Donaldson hit .321/.387/.679
Kyle Higashioka hit .423/.464/1.231
Marwin Gonzalez hit .375/.400/.792

Like el duque says, blah blah blah

Celerino Sanchez said...

I think Pinstripe Alley said "This could be the first team that has 5 guys hit.500." F'ing Ca$hman is a genius

Publius said...

Yesterday was Cashman's most successful day in years. At the major league level. At AAA, where his truest talents lie, there have been plenty of big days.

The Archangel said...

El Duque,
Why the doom and gloom?
Volpe showed he can lace AA and AAA pitching.
That is fundamentally positive.
Maybe you Theta need a touch of Zoloft to make the world a little less overcast.

Doug K. said...

"But how many Burts are out there?"

Burt Convey
Burt Lahr
Engleburt Humperdink.

to name but a few.

el duque said...

Two wins, even exhibition wins, are still two wins.

Except that they are exhibition wins.

Carl J. Weitz said...

Gleyber and the rest of the Yankees are hitting against sub-MLB caliber pitchers and their numbers will be inflated. Perhaps this spring, Higgy will hit 12-15 HR if he lofts it high enough into the wind. But, we all know how many he will produce in the regular season, give or take a few.

Listen, I don't care how well Gleyber hits this spring, we all know that when the bell rings, he will hit no higher than .250, strike out wildly in dire situations where a batted ball would suffice and commit the untimely and deadly error.

At that point, the spelling of his surname must be changed to Gleyber Tsuris to reflect the angst he produces. I will let Doug or Horace explain to those uninitiated as to why. :)

JM said...

"It would be a shame if Donaldson somehow develops a season-ending injury. You know? It would be a darn shame."

--Sheldon Leonard

BTR999 said...

Burt Sienna was always my fav Crayola Crayon.