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Kevin Baker's book is here!
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Friday, June 22, 2012

Sorry if this sounds cynical, but the Scranton Yankees want to stage one of those fake fan polls

What a joke. Years ago, they did it in Syracuse: The Syracuse Chiefs said they were changing the name of the team - politically correct issues with Native Americans - and they wanted public input. Yeah, right. The newspaper held a poll. The fans voted. Then the Chiefs announced their new name: the SkyChiefs. It wasn't even on the ballot. Fan input, my ass. (BTW, they're now the Chiefs again. Amazingly, SkyChiefs didn't catch on.)

So The future Scranton-Wilkes Barre Red Barons now want the good people of SWB to play act in the illusion of democracy and choose a new name for the future Scranton-Wilkes Barre Red Barons. Yeah, right. Fans will get to approve the team being named the Red Barons, which is like the Rooskies approving Putin. So they will be the Red Barons. Why? Don't ask. It's just baseball, which admires change the way Donald Trump admires trailer parks.

Listen: Our stupid Employee of the Month polls have as much integrity as this crapola, and we do the whole thing for mock drama. In the end, they will be the Scranton- Wilkes Barre Red Barons, endorsed by "the people." The city will rejoice in this affirmation of its past. The torch shall be carried. (Look, don't get me wrong. I got nothing personal against Scranton. And I'm not talking down to them: For God's sake,  I live in Syracuse.) This is how it's done in America today: Conduct a poll. Tell everybody what they think. Nobody can argue. And it sure looks open.

BTW, since they won't count anywhere, here are my suggested team names, based on what I've seen while passing through the town:

The SWB Amish Breakfasts Specials
The SWB Mining Disasters
The Scranton-Wilkes Barried Alive
The SWB Turnpike Traffic Cones

The SWB Hydrofrackers
The SWB Just Six Miles to Clark Summits

1 comment:

Rob said...

I voted SWB Centaurs.