Tuesday, June 6, 2017

This is Your Mind on Drugs...


...performance enhancing drugs, that is.



Roger Clemens may have been acquitted of taking PEDs, but that's not necessarily the same as being innocent.  His head is the size of a dumpster and he was known back in the day to suffer the occasional bout of 'roid rage.  

As it turns out, Clemens' oversize cranium may imperil his ability to find a pair of broadcaster's headphones that fit.  This could be a problem, you see, because Clemens is slated to be the broadcaster for the June 16th game between the Astros and Red Sox.  This isn't a "big star visits the booth for the fifth inning" kind of thing.  He's calling the entire game.

The most interesting thing about Clemens broadcasting a Red Sox game is how much agita it has stirred up in Red Sox Nation.  Red Sox fans' lingering dislike of Clemens is well documented, so the decision to allow Clemens into the broadcaster's booth is a bit surprising to some.

As your faithful Behind-Enemy-Lines IIHIIFIIc correspondent, I'll probably give it a listen and will report here if anything meaningful happens.  Until then, please enjoy the links.  It's nice to revel in anything that brings agita to Sox fans...

6 comments:

Alphonso said...

Pointing out the size of Roger's head reminds me of why I never thought Jesus Montero would be successful.

His head was larger than Roger"s and, in concert with his inability to play a position requiring speed and athleticism, no one could find a catcher's helmet large enough to fit him. When they did, it weighed more than a bowling ball.

I referred Jesus and his mentors ( those guys at the last supper?) to a forge in Indiana that still made out-sized things to order. But an iron ore helmet, even if crafted to size, weighed him down.

That's why he has never fit in, and craves ice cream sandwiches.

I am beginning to think the Yankees got the better of the deal.

Although it has taken me this long to say so.

Please don't tell anyone.

KD said...

Alphonso, pour one of your awesome Canadian whiskies for poor ol' Mustang.

KD said...

At Least I have one thing in common with redsock fans: hatred of Clemens. I will carry to my grave this loathing. I will never forget his "retirement" from baseball and all his "heartfelt" words directed at us Yankees fans. He wants to retire as a Yankee. He wants to go into the Hall wearing a Yankees cap. Then the fucker signs for Houston and wins another Cy Young. REALLY? what a rat bastard.

Leinstery said...

The Babe might be enshrined tonight if he gets another at-bat against Tanaka

Beauregard Jackson Pickett Burnside said...

Will someone please tell Suzyn to blow her nose? I'm tired of her snot-sniffing in the mic.

ranger_lp said...

Anyone notice how Barry Bonds' head is almost normal size now? But he never did the "clear", I mean "juice"....yeah.....right....