Friday, October 18, 2019

"Defeat is one thing..."

"...disgrace is another."

—Winston Churchill

I believe I will pass on Five Times Pettitte's dismal 3 2/3 this evening—the man with the perfect, sepulchral face for what will surely be tonight's sepulchral Stadium, round about the midnight hour.

In the four-and-a-half hours this funeral procession will take, I could read one of the world's great books.  Or, you know, drink a lot of bourbon, watch "Hell or High Water" again, and fall asleep on the couch.

Both alternatives seem like very heaven, compared to trying to watch yet another Yankees team stagger through the postseason game.

It will be, I believe, the first time EVER that a Yankees team has lost three straight postseason games at home.

Indeed, my only remaining regret for this version of your New York Yankees is that tonight's game is not being played in Houston.

I truly wish they could be forced to fly down to Houston, endure their next, miserable loss there, and then have to fly all the way back.  Then they would have some small clue of what it felt like to watch that game last night.


Rufus T. Firefly said...

Try "Killer Klowns from Outer Space"

An underrated classic. With a superb performance by Dean Wormer.

TheWinWarblist said...

Skip the sugar garnish, and cut the agave syrup by at least half.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Screw that, go straight for the absinthe!

Maybe you'll hallucinate that this past week never happened!

ranger_lp said...

Heller has replaced CC on the roster...

TheWinWarblist said...

What the fuck is a Heller?

HoraceClarke66 said...

Oh, that's nice. It will be his one chance to get into a playoff game, probably when we're losing about 8-1 in the ninth. Good for him.

And Stanton—still on the roster. Well, we don't want to mess up our World Series chances.

Austria's Only Baseball Fan said...

Sweet Rufus, I think a more appropriate title for Hoss' viewing pleasure is Ray Dennis Steckler's 1964 classic "The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies!!?" It can be interpreted as an omen about the 2019 Yankees.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

AoBF, I can't believe I've never seen that one.

Is it as good as Frankenhooker?

TheWinWarblist said...


Unknown said...

Winnie, “Frankenhooker” has earned a rating of 6.1 on IMDb, whereas “The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies!!?” ranks at 2.2:

A demented friend of mine in NYC has it on Laserdisc and ripped a DVD for me, and then I saw the MST3K riff on it (which cuts several scenes, as MST3K was 90 minutes with all its wrap-around material and intervals, and the movie is 82 minutes).

A MUST-SEE for all fans of cheesy movies!

Anonymous said...

"the first time EVER that a Yankees team has lost three straight postseason games at home"

First time for everything, I suppose. We also hold the ignominious record of blowing a 3 games to none lead in a best of seven series (from 2004, courtesy of Joe Torre). We're the only team ever to accomplish that in major league history. Compared to that debacle, this is nothing.

The Hammer of God

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