Well, sailor, here's your chance...
This month, Honest Abe will give us 15 minutes of ranthood on LoHud, which is to the Yankiverse diehard what Rush Limbaugh is to the old lady living down the street with her 45 cats. That means we're brainstorming 'round the clock to brew and distill our drivel into a 300-word manifesto of hope, the kind that would be worthy of a reading by James Earl Jones at the marriage of Jeet and Minka.
While we're group-groping Roget's Thesaurus, it means good news for you, Mr. and Mrs. General Public.
We're offering you a meal at the big table, with the likes of Shamus, Alphonso, Wailin' Suzyn, Alibi Ike, Whitey Fraud and all the other superstars of the Yankee Obscurity Galaxy Gallery.Blog a mile in our shoes.
You can even throw them.
Yes, Anonymous, this is your chance to etch your name into the eternal wet cement known as the World Wide Web.
Over the next month, send us your diatribe about anything in the Yankiverse (except perhaps the effects of a Yankee loss on that angry oozing pustule centered on your chin) and -- hey! -- crazy us will publish it! Your parents and friends will be amazed to learn that you're the isolated gun-collecting wackjob who submits to loco Yank websites where -- unlike that Cheers theme which was recently sold into TV commercial slavery -- nobody knows your name!
Stay Anonymous. Or come clean. Rip us. Pleasure us. Broker a cease fire between Israel and Palestine. Or between Jenn & Angelina.
Anonymous... we're talking to you now: You've penned some of the greatest lines in history. ("April May, but June Julied.") But it's time to move beyond subway grafitti and phone calls to Larry King.
It's time to reach for Obscure Yankee Fansite Immortality.
Send your soul to elduque.itishigh@gmail.com
Fairy tales can come true... it can happen to you.
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5 comments:
When are you guesting on Honest Abe's blog? Can't wait to read the comments. They've been savage, especially today. Question #2: When are you doing another High-ography video? It's time.
1/15
Be there.
"Can't wait to read the comments. They've been savage, especially today."
:)
She-Fan,
We've got a Yankeeography written, but we lost our mojo during the offseason. Back to it soon.
My computer crashed and all my video stuff was lost in a big happy electronic ball of fire consisting of erectile disfunctional electrons, protesting protons and non-aligned neutrons.
Honestly, with the holiday rush over, we probably should do one on C.C. ImFatterThanYa -- and how he went to a lard farm in bratwurst town and is now phat and happy in Manhattan.
El Duque? You up for it?
Or how about a public service announcement for dyslexics who will try in vain to etch Teixeira into their scorecards this season. (By the way, great job Egg Heads, inventing a word that's impossible to spell to describe a disability that's all about not being able to spell. Next time, why not opt for something like Oops Syndrome or Lleps Syndrome or Ay Before Ee Except after Cee Syndrome?)
((And if we don't do this one, just remember EI EI Oh and you've got it made.))
(((One more thing, I suspect New York-area Dyslexics are really pssied ffo after having been handed Favre and Teixeira within the same calendar year.)))
((((What's next, Mark Grudzielanek as a mid-season acquisition?))))
(((((Like I said, my computer hard drive went soft like a Chippendale dancer performing at a Senior Center Bingo Party, but I'm slowly recovering all my stuff and will be back in the video business by spring training.)))))
((((((Old Man Tom, you there? I found a great site to download Radiohead concerts. Drop me a note.)))))))
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