Saturday, June 7, 2014

If Cashman had done the Bowe Bergdahl deal...

America would have given up...

1. Cash (Unmarked Swiss treasury notes, gold.)
2. "Future considersations" (Known only to CIA)
3. Zolio Almonte.
4. Four terrorists to be named later

Taliban would give up...
1. Bergdahl
2. Alfonso Soriano

John Sterling would...
1. Call it "a fabulous deal," considering America's need for power-hitting outfielder.
2. Start thinking of Bowe Bergdahl home run call. "Booooooowe-klahoma, where the wind goes sweeping down the plain..."

Billy Madden would...
1. Stress that America still needs pitching.
2. Suggest drone plays RF

Fox News would say...
1. Redsocks still doing everything right.
2. Joe Girardi must be impeached.
3. Michael Pineda called "deserter."

What am I missing?


MSNBC said...

Fox's "The Five"

MLB said...

1. Brian Wilson
2. Jason Motte
3. Adam LaRoche
4. Adam Dunn
5. Joba Chamberlain

KD said...

I don't think even Cashman could have fucked up as bad.

Suzyn's Bitch said...

Fucking brilliant!