Sunday, March 9, 2014

"Kelly killed it?" The Master needs to rethink his Kelly Johnson HR call

Yesterday, one of our fine color commentatorizers - Manx - broke the news:

"Kelly killed it" A two run home run for Kelly Johnson and the Yankees take a 4-3 lead on Sports Radio 66 and 101.9 FM WFAN!
Yes, we must never forget that this is merely spring training. The home run calls don't count. Nobody will remember John Sterling's joyful cry in Tampa, long after its been fine tuned or replaced in New York City. Like Joe Girardi, The Master is moving chess pieces, trying various lineups, studying his binder... looking for what works - and what doesn't.

Kelly killed it... no. NO.

Unless I'm missing something - a Broadway show tune from 1935? - there is no musical, literary, societal, political, theological, spiritual or emotional application for "Kelly killed it." It's alliteration. That's all. In fact, if you're doing alliteration, a simple trip to Roget's will bring forth better chances. Kelly crushes it, Kelly clobbers it, Kelly canes it, Kelly creams it, Kelly cleans it, Kelly caps it, Kelly catapults it, Kelly castigates it, Kelly caluminates it, Kelly castrates it...

Let's remember: It's early. Kelly Johnson might not make the Yankee starting lineup. Right now, The Master is working himself into playing shape.

Let's hope Kelly hits a few more this month, just to give John a second shot at the binder.

11 comments:

Celerino Sanchez said...

Kelly kills it? Horrible and lazy. We expect more from the Master of the Microphone

Nicholas Tarnowsky said...

"Might not make the starting roster" he's 100% opening day 3B, unless he gets injured. Him and Sizemore are making the roster

Leinstery said...

These horrible calls are the fault of the Yankees. If they could field a steady roster year after year then the Maestro would have time to hone these calls into masterpieces.

Anonymous said...

A Kellosimo shot

Anonymous said...

Holy Kapowski - Kelly crushed that one to Bayside!!!

Anonymous said...

Kelly kills it has double alliteration going for it. Plus it sustains Sterling's morbid preoccupation with homicidal imagery, most memorably etched into the baseball lexicon with "An A-Bomb from Arod." Granted, Kelly kills it lacks the genocidal grandeur of the Arod call, but it sustains the same line of taste-free dementia.

Anonymous said...

Kelly wasn't smelly!

John M said...

Kelly Johnson...Kelly Johnson...

Do you think maybe he had something better using the guy's last name but his high moral standards drove him to using Kelly instead?

Don said...

A GRUBER from Kelly!

Leinstery said...

A+ on the Kelly Kapowski reference.

Anonymous said...

Kelly bangs a Jeter! Oh wait, that's Minka Kelly. Either way, a young girl goes home with a souvenier ball.