Friday, March 28, 2014

News From Norway

What if el duque returns from Norway a changed man? What if all he wants to blog about is eels, or leprosy? Here's a roundup of the kind of thing we could be reading about.

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Otter goes on rampage in fast food restaurant
Witnesses said the otter was breathing heavily, and customers were so afraid that they fled from the business.

Norway's Army introduces unisex dorms
The Norwegian armed forces have previously distinguished themselves for progressive ideas such as allowing male recruits to grow their hair long… and serving vegetarian meals once a week. 

US diplomats urge Senate to reject Norway ambassador nominee
He referred to Norway's president, apparently believing that the country is a republic rather than a constitutional monarchy, and described the Progress party, one of the two party's in the country's coalition government as "fringe elements" who "spew their hatred". 

Officials weigh ban on football players talking to refs
“It may be that only the captain is allowed to talk to the referee, and that the other players talk to the captain. It has been tried in other sports to give the captain a more prominent role,” said former Liverpool and Stoke City defender (Frode) Kippe.

Artists install Monty Python-inspired crosswalk sign, provoke traffic officials
“The municipality has authority over the sign, generally-speaking,” explains Elisabeth Bechmann, head of section for the Eastern Norway Region at the Public Roads Administration (NRPA). “Nevertheless, it’s up to the Directorate of Public Roads (Vegdirektoratet) to make a decision on what to do in this matter as superior authority."

Jag fick ett mejl från min pappa som inte var helt positivt. "Vad i hela världen har du gjort!? Tror du att du kommer hem med den där?! Din mamma har brutit ihop", skrev han.

Corruption cloud settles over Norway
Leading companies in which the state has a major stake have been hitting the headlines, suspected of bribery scandals, and now even the country’s enormous fishing industry is believed to be involved in some stinky business.

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English words from Norwegian:

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Trailer for Lilyhammer:


KD said...

Duque, if you're read this and not hiding from otters, here's a good joke to tell your new friends which I know they will appreciate:

Ole went to the Sons of Norway Hall one night and finally won the door prize, which was a toilet brush. He was so excited that he won he brought it home and used it often. Someone asked him during the next meeting what the prize was and if he liked it or not. Ole replied, "Yea I like the toilet brush, but I think I'm gonna go back to using paper."

KD said...

somebody stop me!

Sven and Ole go fishing. It’s such a great day, they rent a boat so they can fish from the middle of the lake. They row out, drop their lines, and before you know it, they're catching fish, one after another after another. They can’t believe what a great fishing spot they found.
Sven says, “This is the best fishing spot in the county. It’s just too bad we didn’t bring some paint.”
Ole asks, “Paint? Why should you want paint, to go fishing?”
“Well Ole, don’t you see, so we can paint an “X” in the bottom of the boat, so we can find this spot next time.”
Ole laughs at him. “Sven, don’t be such a dummy! Next time, what if they give us a different boat?”

Alphonso said...

In order to make this relevant to the Yankees, or to John And Suzyn, we must at minimum acknowledge that all the actors in Lillehammer are Yankee fans, despite the apparent Brooklyn roots of the star.

Ben Dover said...

Without El Duque this blog sucks a mad one.

KD said...

Clearly, Midwestern humor is an acquired taste, similar to Lutefisk.

Ken of Brooklyn said...

LOL!!!!!!!! Preying you all chime in when El Duque returns, it's been a BLAST this week!