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Monday, March 24, 2014

Place Yer Bets, Ladies and Germs

LoHud had this a couple hours ago:

"Joe Girardi just announced that CC Sabathia will start on Thursday, Hiroki Kuroda on Friday and Ivan Nova on Saturday. He said it’s safe to read into that order, meaning Sabathia, Kuroda and Nova will open as the top three starters pitching in Houston.
"That leaves, as expected, Masahiro Tanaka to make his major-league debut in Toronto, likely in the fourth game of the season.
"Girardi said he has picked his fifth starter, but because he has not told all of the pitchers involved, he will not announce it until tomorrow."

Phelps or Pineda? If it's Pineda, this will be the first time ever that Alphonso missed a prediction. He has repeatedly said that the Piñata will never pitch an inning in Yankee pinstripes at the major league level.
This is a crisis in the making. If Alphonso is wr...wr...wro...--well, you know the word I mean. It would either be the best-ever case of reverse juju (did I just jinx it?) or the simple collapse of an infallible Yankees analyst.
The tension is killing me (Anonymous will only hope). And people wonder why I drink.
Actually, any excuse will do, but this is a damn good one.

12 comments:

Ken of Brooklyn said...

WELCOME to the big leagues John M, looking forward to many a future post!

Stang said...

For the record, Alphonso's been wrong before. He said Phil Rizzuto would never make it in the majors at that height, and he said Cleveland slugger Ray Chapman's fatal head injury at the hands of Yankee pitcher Carl Mays was, his exact words, "only a flesh wound."

Leinstery said...

I've been thinking, and I'm going to reverse my stance on the Kitten Bowl's effect on The Master. If we remember last year, John was drinking heavily because Jeter was injured and he didn't know how to cope. He's in top form already simply because Jeter's back and he has quit the sauce. That would explain the sexual tension between he and Suzyn that has been noticed lately. All of last season John was so drunk he probably bedded Suzyn every night. Now that he has his senses back, he has rejected her and being a women, she doesn't understand why.

JM said...

Mustang, is it possible to die from a flesh wound?

Obviously these examples are from before my time as an Alphonso reader. Since there was no internet back then, I don't know where he posted his thoughts.

If they are available on microfiche, let me know.

JM said...

And thanks, Ken.

I think Leinstery is onto something.

Anonymous said...

John M with a featured post? The Marv Thronberry of the comments columns, who wouldn't know WRC+ from UZR from his ass? Looks like Brian Cashman isn't the only one with a predilection for dumpster diving.

KD said...

Good grief, anony. must you cross post your John M fixation?

Anonymous said...

Yet, Kinda Dumb, you ply your obsession with me in nearly every thread.

Hypocrite much?

Ken of Brooklyn said...

Yes Anon, I agree with KD, your cross post obsession with John M is fast approaching the Fatal Attraction level, LOL!!!!!

I'm Bill White said...

I guess Pineda could conceivably pitch 1/3 or 2/3 of an inning in the majors and still fit within the contours of Alphonso's prediction.

Anonymous said...

Ken of Brooklyn--I cross-posted exactly ONE comment--inadvertently.

You can trace every incident and you will see that John M. has initiated the malice on every occasion. But you and your confreres seem a bit too preoccupied with petty gossip and herd-mentality pile-ons to correctly identify the real source of the toxins on this list. (Hint: it isn't me).

Ken of Brooklyn said...

Anonymous, nobody likes to be bullied or should be felt to be under attack, I agree with you 100%. I genuinely look forward to your insights and wisdom, your a brilliant writer and I often agree with your assessments.
I tune into IIHIIFIIC to read about baseball, specifically the Yankees and the Almighty John Sterling. What I especially like about this site is the diversity of comments and the variety of views concerning this team.
I'd prefer the trash talk the 'idiots/kinda dumbs/philistines' personal attacks were kept out of the equation,,, often times perpetual one upmanship hijacks the thread, and though it is entertaining at times (until it ventures into cruelty), it has nothing to do with baseball.