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Thursday, August 14, 2014

It feels like 1978 again, with the Yankees - any minute now - ready to make their move

After last night's speed bump in Baltimore, a few of you Yank fans might feel a bit disillusioned, even ornery and cynical.

I say this... 

GET OFF MY LAWN!

How quickly you seem to have forgotten the great Yankee comeback of 1978! Because we sure looked dead then - out by 14 games in July - and you know what happened? Ol' Bucky Dent homered, and we won the One Game, Visiting Team Wild Card playoff. Look at this Yankee club, and it's hard not to feel the magic bubbling up from the dugout. Hey, is Jimmy Carter the President, 'cause I'm plugging in the WalkMan and listening to some Van Halen!

Tonight, we'll lick our wounds, and tomorrow, we'll lick our chops: It's the Tampa Bay Devil Rays, who technically don't even exist in 1978! Plus, we've got our Yankee Big Three starters: McCarthy, Greene and Kuroda - alias "McGreekur." All we need is to win - say - 12 out of 13, and - BANG - as fast as you can say "Reggie-Reggie-Reggie," we'll be right back in the AL, away-field-advantage, one game Wild Card pennant race.  

And Saturday, Thurman McCann comes off the DL!

You can feel Martin Prado starting to heat up, like a supervolcano in Yellowstone, ready to spew white hot emissions all over the North American continent. Boy, do those Arizona Diamondbacks look dumb - wait a minute: they don't exist either! Those desert morons traded Prado for some young guy that nobody's ever heard of. The YES announcers have already declared the deal a big win for the Yankees and their master jewel thief, Brian Cashman. Frankly, it doesn't matter what happens: We won the trade. We got Prado free, for nothing. And for two more seasons! Our second base, third base and right field problems are solved. Plus, we have Reggie Beltran! 

One huge benefit from last night: We didn't need to use Goose Robertson! In Tampa, ol' Houdini should be fresh as a can of tuna - that is, unless Catfish McCarthy hurls a two-hit gem. 

Ichiro is swinging the bat well lately. And great to see Michael Pineda back! Someday, he's gonna be real good. And word is that Tanaka is now throwing regulation nerf balls off a flat surface. He could be back for the stretch run, that big final series in Boston! 

I'm telling you, we're getting ready to make our move. Too bad the casinos in Atlantic City have closed, because a couple more losses, and they'd be ripe for the plucking. I'd say more, but mum's the word: I've got to wait for Vegas odds-makers to go a little higher before betting the house on Bucky and the boys. Can't write any more. Foreigner just came on the mix tape! Those guys are smokin'! 

2 comments:

JM said...

This is brilliant. How come nobody commented on this post?

Oh, wait, I just did.

Well, since there's a lot of space here in the comments section, here are the top 100 hits of 1978. (Jay Ferguson is at 50? I thought I was the only person who bought that album, much less a single by the guy...)

Jesus, there are Gibbs all over the place here:

1. Shadow Dancing, Andy Gibb
2. Night Fever, The Bee Gees
3. You Light Up My Life, Debby Boone
4. Stayin' Alive, The Bee Gees
5. Kiss You All Over, Exile
6. How Deep Is Your Love, The Bee Gees
7. Baby Come Back, Player
8. (Love Is) Thicker Than Water, Andy Gibb
9. Boogie Oogie Oogie, A Taste Of Honey
10. Three Times a Lady, The Commodores
11. Grease, Frankie Valli
12. I Go Crazy, Paul Davis
13. You're the One That I Want, John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John
14. Emotion, Samantha Sang
15. Lay Down Sally, Eric Clapton
16. Miss You, The Rolling Stones
17. Just the Way You Are, Billy Joel
18. With a Little Luck, Wings
19. If I Can't Have You, Yvonne Elliman
20. Dance, Dance, Dance (Yowsah, Yowsah, Yowsah), Chic
21. Feels So Good, Chuck Mangione
22. Hot Child In the City, Nick Gilder
23. Love Is Like Oxygen, The Sweet
24. It's a Heartache, Bonnie Tyler
25. We Will Rock You / We Are the Champions, Queen
26. Baker Street, Gerry Rafferty
27. Can't Smile Without You, Barry Manilow
28. Too Much, Too Little, Too Late, Johnny Mathis and Deniece Williams
29. Dance With Me, Peter Brown
30. Two Out of Three Ain't Bad, Meat Loaf
31. Jack and Jill, Raydio
32. Take a Chance On Me, Abba
33. Sometimes When We Touch, Dan Hill
34. Last Dance , Donna Summer
35. Hopelessly Devoted to You, Olivia Newton-John
36. Hot Blooded, Foreigner
37. You're In My Heart (The Final Acclaim), Rod Stewart
38. The Closer I Get to You, Roberta Flack and Donny Hathaway
39. Dust In the Wind, Kansas
40. Magnet and Steel, Walter Egan
41. Short People, Randy Newman
42. Use Ta Be My Girl, The O'Jays
43. Our Love, Natalie Cole
44. Love Will Find a Way, Pablo Cruise
45. An Everlasting Love, Andy Gibb
46. Love Is in the Air, John Paul Young
47. Goodbye Girl, David Gates
48. Slip Slidin' Away, Paul Simon
49. The Groove Line, Heatwave
50. Thunder Island, Jay Ferguson

JM said...

51. Imaginary Lover, Atlanta Rhythm Section
52. Still the Same, Bob Seger and The Silver Bullet Band
53. My Angel Baby, Toby Beau
54. Disco Inferno, The Trammps
55. On Broadway, George Benson
56. Come Sail Away, Styx
57. (Every Time I Turn Around) Back in Love Again, L.T.D.
58. This Time I'm in It for Love, Player
59. You Belong to Me, Carly Simon
60. Here You Come Again, Dolly Parton
61. Blue Bayou, Linda Ronstadt
62. Peg, Steely Dan
63. You Needed Me, Anne Murray
64. Shame, Evelyn "Champagne" King
65. Reminiscing, Little River Band
66. Count On Me, Jefferson Starship
67. Baby Hold On, Eddie Money
68. Hey Deanie, Shaun Cassidy
69. Summer Nights, John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John
70. What's Your Name, Lynyrd Skynyrd
71. Don't It Make My Brown Eyes Blue, Crystal Gayle
72. Because the Night, Patti Smith
73. Every Kinda People, Robert Palmer
74. Copacabana (At the Copa), Barry Manilow
75. Always and Forever, Heatwave
76. You and I, Rick James
77. Serpentine Fire, Earth, Wind and Fire
78. Sentimental Lady, Bob Welch
79. Falling, LeBlanc and Carr
80. Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood, Santa Esmeralda
81. Bluer Than Blue, Michael Johnson
82. Running On Empty, Jackson Browne
83. Whenever I Call You "Friend", Kenny Loggins
84. Fool (If You Think It's Over), Chris Rea
85. Get Off, Foxy
86. Sweet Talkin' Woman, Electric Light Orchestra
87. Life's Been Good, Joe Walsh
88. I Love the Nightlife, Alicia Bridges
89. You Can't Turn Me Off (In the Middle of Turning Me On), High Inergy
90. It's So Easy, Linda Ronstadt
91. Native New Yorker, Odyssey
92. Flashlight, Parliament
93. Don't Look Back, Boston
94. Turn to Stone, Electric Light Orchestra
95. I Can't Stand the Rain, Eruption
96. Ebony Eyes, Bob Welch
97. The Name of the Game, Abba
98. We're All Alone, Rita Coolidge
99. Hollywood Nights, Bob Seger and The Silver Bullet Band
100. Deacon Blues, Steely Dan