Monday, May 2, 2016

Mayday... Mayday... Mayday.... This isn't mediocrity. This is something far worse.

So here's how it happens: Dellin Betances - unhittable Dellin - gives up the winning blast to a defense-only catcher who hasn't homered since 2014. Our best pitcher blows two games in three nights. Wow.

Listen... this isn't luck. Folks, this isn't talent or even old age.

This, my friends, is the stuff of Fate...

        Whether you're early,
        Or whether you're late,
        It's don't mean shit to Fate.

Listen: There is an overwhelming certainty about the 2016 Yankees, a sense of death by quicksand, which transcends sample size and history. It is the knowledge that somehow, regardless of score and circumstances, this Yankee team is destined to lose. You can read it on the faces of the players. You see it in Girardi's moves. And we all know what's next.

The Yankees will win a few games - (You can't lose 'em all!) They'll show slight electrical pulses in the cortex, as A-Rod did last night, or "No-Hit Nathan" Eovaldi did last week. (As opposed to last night, when he couldn't keep a lead.) They'll start to rectify their course. The YES team will assure us the Yankees are making their move...

And then the injuries will hit.

Yes, the injuries. They're out there, circling our boat like a horde of sharks. The tweaks, the tears, the Tommy Johns, the Lou Gehrigs, the Chuck Knoblauchs and the Muhammad Alis. (Maybe even a CC or a Johnny Manzel?) The collisions, the dives, the sprains.... they're coming.

Think about this: We've achieved the fourth worst record in baseball with a healthy team. We've collapsed without even touching all those bad vibes we've been storing in the juju vault. Soon, that door will pop open, but it won't happen until the players start to hit.

Saturday night, the YES courtiers suggested that the Retrieval Empire should return to the ways of 2005, when they revived a lifeless team by bringing up Joggie Cano and Chien-Ming Wang. I agree. They should bring up Cano and Wang! Trouble is, the 2016 versions are Nick Swisher and Phil Coke. They managed to crush Rob Refsnyder's soul and leave the young OFs with no places to go. The Scranton team - with Kozma, Puello, Parmelee, et al - is barely younger than the Redsock lineup that swept us this weekend.

Folks, the fix is in.

Fourth worst team in baseball, behind Minnesota, Houston and Atlanta. Last in the AL East. Seven games below .500. Old, tired and - worst of all - you can feel it: This is a team of destiny. Wow.


Honey Barnes said...

Bravo! Bravo! Say it again!

Joe Formerlyof Brooklyn said...

Teams can lose with young guys making mistakes (or not living up to their hoped-for performance, based on minor league achievements).

This can actually be exciting. Remember The September of Shane Spencer?

Or they can lose with a bunch of old guys who have already faded away, plus a group of young mediocrities. This was the story of the team in the 1965-73 period. Remember that?

Well, if you do NOT remember that, it appears that you do not have to. It's happening again, right now.

I'm Bill White said...

Would John Sterling ever consider ending his 5,000+ broadcast streak (which is described as a record that "will stand the test of time" in his NYS Broadcasters Hall of Fame background piece), as a form of non-violent protest?

John M said...

Where's Hoss Clarke when you need him?

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Horace Clarke. The original no-neck.

As much as they sucked, I loved those teams.