Tuesday, April 30, 2019

So the question becomes... what happens to Greg Bird?

With Luke Voit winning AL Player of the Week - (by the way, hooyah to Luke Voit, AL Player of the Week!) - the time has come to ponder the sad, grimy underside of the rainbow: Greg Bird. 

Unless Voit gets hurt - (fans know this a virtual impossibility) - Bird is done as a private contractor on the Death Star. Frankly, even if Voit gets hurt - (obviously, it can't happen) - the marriage can't be saved. Hey, it didn't work. It's the vagaries of love. It's nobody's fault. If you want to blame anybody, blame me. If only I hadn't blown my stack and said those things on opening day, after he struck out in his first three at-bats.

But as Sansa Stark told Peter Dinklage in the crypt Sunday night: The most heroic thing we can do is be honest: Voit is for real, and he's not going to platoon with a guy who can't reach .200, no matter how great that particular guy looked while hitting a playoff HR against Andrew Miller. Not only that, but Voit is also a giant puppy, the type of guy you want in your clubhouse - (not saying Bird isn't) - and he deserves to play when not injured (which should be always.) 

So... what can the Yankees do with Greg Bird?

He is 26, which means he's not done. In fact, he deserves one last shot, preferably in a small market. His fielding is so-so - better than Voit's, which is slightly better than a catcher's - and Bird made some bonehead plays early this season. The YES propaganda machine claimed he'd added 10 pounds of lady-pleasing testosterone, and he looked hooked-up to a bicycle pump. But he didn't hit bigger: One HR, whacked after he heard my screams on opening day. (If only I could have held my tongue.) 

Let me state for the record: I still like Bird. I wish it worked out. Someday, he'll hit 25 home runs and bat .260, and feed his family for life on the proceeds of a career year. (He's a free agent in 2022.) Someday, he'll meet the god of hitting. But as Arya Stark told the red lady, "Not today!" 

So... what do we do?

First, we wait until Bird is healed. Or heeled, since that's his problem. (Ha ha!) That could be a month, maybe more. Who knows? Bird heals at a geological rate. Then Cooperstown Cashman will send him to Scranton. Why? Because he can. I think Bird still has an option. 

Then, Cash will start looking for low-level minor league arms. Whenever the Yankees fear losing a player to the Rule 5 draft, or Food Stamps Hal has a spasm from eating bad Scranton scrapple, they trade the guy for a few low A rifles who once wowed a wonk with a radar gun. I'm thinking that Bird will not return to the Bronx this season, unless Voit goes on the Injured List. And we all know that can't happen. Right?

12 comments:

Beauregard Jackson Pickett Burnside said...

So... you’re saying we’ll see Bird at first by Memorial Day, or Labor Day? Poor Voit, doesn’t know what hit him (because it hasn’t happened yet...). you can’t predict baseball but you can predict the DL (fuck the IL! If you’re injured, you’re on the down low, forever. Baseball players get disabled, Injured people call Salino and Barnes).

Carl J. Weitz said...

Bird will be sent down then be back in the September call ups.
He will be traded in the off season.

JM said...

Sometimes you just have to change the scenery. Bird is the Nick Johnson of his era, but Johnson actually performed better those rare days he wasn't hurt. He went on to have a career elsewhere. All the best, Birdie.

Voit has nothing to worry about. I saw part of the PBA match on Fox1 last night. Voit could throw the featured bowlers down the lane for a strike every time. What he'd do with a bowling ball makes the pins shiver in fear.

If baseball doesn't work out--or even later on if it does--I can see Voit slamming the pins for some easy money. Bird, not so much. In the first place, he looks too much like a frightened pin.

Anonymous said...

HE SHOULD LOOK FOR HOUSING IN SCRANTON.

VERY SIMPLE, ONCE HEALED, HE GOES TO SCRANTON AND STAYS THERE UNTIL HE SHOWS, OVER THE COURSE OF 2 MONTHS OF EVERYDAY MINOR LEAGUE BASEBALL, THAT HE IS A .300 HITTER, WHO LEARNS HOW TO HIT THE BALL THE OTHER WAY, DRAWS WALKS, AND KNOCKS IN RUNS.

GIVEN WHAT WE HAVE SEEN THE LAST COUPLE YEARS, I'M AFRAID THAT DOESN'T SEEM POSSIBLE.

DEAL HIM IF THERE IS A SUITOR, BUT THE HOPE HERE IS THAT WE WAIT FOR HIM TO START PUTTING UP NUMBERS IN SCRANTON THEN DEAL HIM COME JULY IN PART OF A PACKAGE THAT NETS US BUMGARNER.

NOTE: UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES DO WE TRADE THE "RED STORM". NO WAY.
IF COOP CAN'T FIGURE THAT OUT BY NOW, HE'S GOT BRAIN DAMAGE.

Joe Formerlyof Brooklyn said...


This is what becomes of prospect hugging

Anonymous said...

IMHO, Byrd will be a mid-level major league player with a small market team in the Mid-West and we will never have to read about him again. Posted by Just Another Yankee Fan from afar.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Amen, Duque. It is a shame how it worked out. But now, even if Voit WERE to get hurt, I'd rather see Ford out there, who at least seems to be the OBP machine he was thought to be.

And yes, ALL-CAPS, keep Clint!

I also don't want us to trade Thairo, and it's NOT because of all those pharaoh headdresses I still have in the warehouse.

Anonymous said...

Bird's age is irrelevant. He is done. He can't hit. End of sad story.

Vampifella said...

He's Rob Refsnyder 2.0. As a fan, we'll say he was held back and never really given any chance to show his true stuff. Reality is that he'll soon be traded for a broom (a McBroom), selected off of wavers, purchased for next to nothing, released, signed for next to nothing and then traded for a player to be named later or cash...all the while hitting below his own weight and barely getting in 30 games a season. I can see him hopping between 6 teams in 2 years like good old Ref.

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