Tuesday, November 27, 2018

CaNO.

A few years ago, after Robinson Cano turned his back on the Yankees and jogged off to Seattle for the sweet sound of coins rattling in a paper cup, Jimmy Fallon on the Tonight Show did a street skit on the matter. 

He encouraged Yankee fans to tell off a cardboard cutout of Cano, and when they finished, Robby stepped out of the trailer. Bad-a-boom. They hugged, and the basic message was that Yankee fans secretly still loved Cano, despite his greed and betrayal. 




Nice skit, but not true. Upon returning to Yankee Stadium, Cano was lustily booed, and he always will be. He turned down the chance to be a Yankee icon, a chance few players ever receive, (and which Manny Machado and Bryce Harper are both chasing, by the way.)

The other day, desperate to shed the $120 million millstone that Cano has become - as everyone knew he would be - the Mariners recently called the Yankees and suggested a deal. Hey, ol' buddy ol' pal, how about you give us that miserable, broken down Jacoby Ellsbury, and we'll actually give you a great, shiny Robinson Cano! Win-win! Everybody happy!

They must have thought we were in a skit on the Tonight Show. 

Sorry, folks. No on Cano. 

You know, I really loved the guy, before he walked out on us. Mostly, I remember John Sterling at the end, assuring Yankee fans with all his might that Cano would stay a Yankee, that the two sides would certainly find a compromise, that nothing else made sense. And then, kaboom, Cano walked.

Nope. No on Cano. He's running out of games at 2B, and his jog is slowing to a crawl. He'll probably have one decent year in the next five, and you better believe that Seattle will be offering him around. Soon, he'll be a DH soon. And soon, just you wait, he'll be running out grounders. He'll be doing head-first slides and barreling down the line, desperate for a hit. 

We have Ellsbury for two years at $47 million. Yeah, it's a waste of money. And you know what? If Fallon recreated that skit, and Yankee fans told off a cardboard version of Ellsbury, they would keep yelling at him when he stepped out. But I don't ever recall the Chief jogging to first, not once. And I'll take it.

No on Cano. No, no, no. 

9 comments:

Ceeja said...

At least Cano played hurt. He was very durable. Not made of glass like Ellsbury, Bird, Pavano, and Nick Johnson. There are different kinds if hustle. Cano did not run out every meaningless grounder. Not commendable, but he play the whole season and played it well.

I never saw Bobby Richardson. But of the yankee second basemen 8ve seen, Cano is the best.

BUT: WHO WANTS HIS CRAP CONTRACT? Throw in enough money and I'd take him back

Ceeja said...

Please excuse the typos. I know the drunk blog us over.

JM said...

This smells like a story ginned up by the press into something it's not. The Mariners might float the Canoe to NY teams, but that doesn't mean they'll get on board. Cano is too old and has not position to play on the Yankees, including DH, and I think even Cashman knows that.

I cannot believe they DFA's Toe. I mean, the guy performed whenever he was called on, he hits better than the white boys they've signed to take his place and fields better, too. Wtf? How is this even possible? That's not even counting his effect in the clubhouse and dugout, where he was beloved and helped create a fun, winning atmosphere.

I knew this offseason would suck, but somehow thought maybe, after the Walker bullshit, Toe would be back to walk in the footsteps of Luis Sojo. Guess not.

What assholes we have in the front office.

13bit said...

That we are even discussing Cano as a possible trade sickens me.

Oh wait...it's "Giving Tuesday." Perhaps Joggy and his other buddies in MLB need our help?

Is there a Joginson Cano GoFundMe page?

Fuck this shit.

Anonymous said...

Maybe they can hire Toe as a hitting instructor at some point. That would get him back on the bench while not taking up a roster spot and he could teach them this newfangled hitting concept called "Contact". Supposedly when a ball is pitched you can just try to hit it as opposed to kill it. Crazy right?

Doug K.

13bit said...

Torreyes DFA. Fuck you, Brian.

Anonymous said...

GUESS WHAT I SEE HAPPENING?

TORREYES GETS PICKED UP.....

BY THE BOSTON RED SOX.

HE WILL KILL US IN REVENGE MODE.

ACTUALLY, ANYONE IN THE A.L. EAST THAT PICKS HIM UP WILL BE A DISASTER FOR US SOMEWHERE DOWN THE ROAD.

UN-FUCKING-BELIEVABE.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, DFA-ing Toe thoroughly & completely sucks. Just damned depressing - - just what we needed. Thanks so much for the early Xmas present, FO a-ho's!! LB (No J)

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