Tuesday, August 13, 2019

Somebody at the Washington Post just now got the idea to turn baseball play-by-play into verse, and it's amazing

Why didn't we think of that?


Rufus T. Firefly said...

I smell a copyright infringement lawsuit in the air.

Call Cellino and Barnes!

Or Cellino! Or Barnes! Just don't tell them you talked to the other guy.

13bit said...

I don't think you can copyright an idea, sadly. This is where baseball bats to the knee come into play as a legal solution.

It's sad, but these young people today [gripping my walker] all think they have invented everything. And, since they don't read, they have no idea of what happened before they were brought into the world by their helicopter parents.

I'm going to have more coffee and go forth and spread love in the world.

O, Holy Cow, indeed...

Alibi Ike said...

Editors needed, badly, for both the announcer and the columnist.

Ken of Brooklyn said...

And this goes to show just how boring all of these other commentators are, as compared to The Master!

HoraceClarke66 said...

Fortunately, the second commenter on the article brought up what he or she called "the superior effort" that is "O, Holy Cow."

Also, the calls picked by the ignorant Matt Bonesteel (quite a moniker; we're sure it's not Alphonso under a nom de plum?) were not nearly as funny as the Rizzuto ones picked by our Peerless Leader.

JM said...

Brazen ignorance and thievery. May Gleyber smite him with a Grand Salami.

ranger_lp said...


Prior to tonight’s game, the Yankees:
-DFA'd LHP Joe Mantiply
-Released LHP Daniel Camarena from roster
-Returned RHP Jonathan Loaisiga (#43) from rehab & reinstated him from 60-day IL
-Signed RHP Adonis Rosa (#73) to a M.L. contract & selected him to 25-man from @swbrailriders

ranger_lp said...

Another fun fact...if we go 21-21 rest of the season, we will win 100 games.

Rufus T. Firefly said...


And the DEVIL Rays would need to go 31-11 to beat the Yankees 100 wins. (Yankees win the tie breaker)

Joe Mantiply, we barely knew ye.
German could possibly win 20 this year. They will probably sit him at 19 wins for an innings limit.
Urshella is still on a roll, but Torres is slumping (a no homer game against the Orioles counts here).
Sanchez 2 for 4 (I'll take it)
Judge actually pulled a ball. It stayed in the park, but at least he pulled it.
Yes interviewed Boone this morning (probably taped) and they asked him about savages -- it was pretty funny.

Local Bargain Jerk said...

Another fun fact...if we go 21-21 rest of the season, we will win 100 games

Ranger, my friend, that's a very fun fact indeed.

I will contemplate it and rest and try to post something remotely intelligent about it tomorrow.

Looks like pessimistic me is going to lose the pre-season predictions contest, but I'm happy to lose on those terms.

Joe of AZ said...

I already like Rosa better than Holder.... It will be too soon if Holder NEVER comes back

Rufus T. Firefly said...


Here's the link.


I win the non-contest if they go .500 the rest of the way. I hope I am way under. If we discount Parson's undefeated hopeful season, Joe FoB tops out at 109 (unlikely, but very doable without a disastrous west coast trip and would be most welcome here). Carl is at 104. I hope he's on the under also.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Joe of AZ, what you said.

As Suzyn pointed out, Urshela would be battling the General for best batting average (an outdated stat, I know) if he had enough PA's. (He has no chance of getting enough)
Maybin at .312, Tauchman at .299, Romine (!) 3 for 4 at .271 -- and Rosa didn't look too bad for a bambi in the headlights kinda guy.

Life is good today.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Indeed. Very nice win—especially encouraged by Judge actually being able to pull the ball. We'll see.

There is no truth to the rumor that the Yankees signed Mantiply because they thought they were getting the superhero, "Mantisfly," who possesses the relative speed and elusiveness of the average house fly, plus the deadly mating bite of the praying mantis.

Asked what on-the-field benefit he hoped to derive from the Mantisfly's lethal postcoital inclinations, General Manager Brian Cashman admitted that he did not know what it would mean for the Yankees' stretch drive, but that "it would be really cool to see."

Beauregard Jackson Pickett Burnside said...

That Washington post article was useless. Some authors make it look effortless, some actually are effortless. Perhaps it needed a few Trump slams worked in for the Pulitzer, but it was not to be. Democracy dies in darkness, and that communist paper is published at night.

TheWinWarblist said...

Cleveland just tied it up against the Ketchups in the bottom of the ninth!! And they're still hitting!!

Fuck you Hal. And you too Hank for being such a fucknut that you can't be trusted near the franchise. Fuckers, both of you.

13bit said...

Jennifer Swindal is George's true heir. She actually likes baseball. Sadly, the patriarchy runs strong in the Streinbrenner clan. God forbid a woman run the team.

Beauregard Jackson Pickett Burnside said...

Why are we stuck with Hal anyway? Whatever happened to Hank? My old man’s nickname was Hank... we went to visit Grandma and she had saved a copy of some newspaper from when George was banned and it said “Hank to run Yankees”. So let’s see, that would have been 1990... I was... 12... still remember it though!

HoraceClarke66 said...

Tribe managed to blow it.

One out, Boston's reliever has given up a single and double among the first 3 batters he faced in the 9th...and Cleveland decides to have Lindor try to steal 3rd.

Guy on second, one out, Boston rattled, and you're at home...and you do that. Anyway, he's thrown out, and they lose on a Jackie Rogers, Jr. homer in the 10th. Aggravating.

But interesting fact: Boston is now so desperate they actually used Cashner as a reliever in the 10th. Between him and Eovaldi, they now have 2 starters working the pen.

Parson Tom said...

Boston is done. I love watching them lose, but they are not a good team and they are done. Tampa and Cleveland look tough. Minnesota, too, especially if you think about the karmic payback they are due for all the ass-whippings we've given them during the past three generations. And then there is Houston.

The Yankees look like world-beaters when they're busy plumping their stats against Single A Baltimore, but today is our last game of the year against them.

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