Tuesday, August 23, 2022

Yankee fans get to experience two wins in a row, but who closes for this team?

 Quickly now, a pop quiz... name the Yankee closer: 

1. Jonathan Loaisiga
2. Aroldis Chapman
3. Luke Bard
4. Lucas Luetge
5. Ron Marinaccio
6. Wandy Peralta
7. Lou Trivino
8. Clarke Schmidt

Ha. Fooled you. It's a trick question. The answer is 9, "none of the above." 

There is no Yankee closer, nor is there a "closer- by-committee," a "circle of trust," a preference ranking or a pecking order. There is whoever the fuck looks good - (except for Aroldis, we'll get to him.) And come October, if that situation remains, it is our certain downfall.

Last night, when Domingo German left in the seventh, the game instantly became a crap shoot, the two-run lead, a wad of Kleenex. Suddenly, we were using Marinaccio - a Scrantonian last week, and a "dead arm" last month - and Loaisiga, with an ERA over 6.00.  

But - spoiler alert - the Yankees prevailed! Two in a row, hooray! As long as our starters pitch lights out into the seventh, who knows? But come October, who will pitch the ninth? Without an answer, there's no gentle way of putting it: Yankees are fucking doomed. So, who ya gonna call?

Loaisiga. Looked good last night. Pitched to contact, and gave up pop flies. No walks.  His ERA remains around 6.00. All season, he's been dreadful. But but BUT... he's only thrown 29 innings. (Last year, 70.) If he returned to form, he's our best shot.

El Chapo. Nope. We thought he was back, then came the gruesome implosions against Tampa and Toronto. He's lost his 102-mph fastball, and he's never developed an "out" pitch to match it. Hey, he's had a great career. Maybe he can survive next year as a LOOGY. But as a closer, nope. Barring a miracle resurgence, (PEDs?) there is no way Boone would pit him in the ninth in a close playoff game. It would kill both careers.

Clay Holmes. Yeesh. What in the name of Atlee Hammaker happened to him? Best in baseball for three months, then a HR derby. Can two-weeks off restore him? (Who here doesn't think his IL designation was for mental health? When he was getting whacked, did he tell anybody that his back was hurting?) Let's hope he comes back in spring form. But MLB history is full of one-half wonders. Was he simply too good to be true?

Zack Britton. Of all candidates, this is silliest. Britton is pushing heroically to return, because a) he's a great teammate, b) he's a union leader and c) it will give him a shot at a decent contract this winter. I'm fine with that. Gotta feed his family. Think of the contract he'd demand if he became Mariano in October. But he's 34 and threw 18 innings last year, with an ERA near 6.00. They say he's near a minor league rehab assignment. I dunno. 

Scott Effross. Let the record show that, for about three games, he looked like the closer-to-be - then went bye-bye with an aching shoulder. He's also still among league leaders in games pitched. Maybe, time off will do him good. But is he a closer? Dunno.  

Greg Weissert. Now we're really into the ozone. He's a 27 year-old, 6'2, RH closer at Scranton. Eighteen saves. One problem, though: The Yankees almost never bring up closers from Scranton, the memory of Colter Bean still stinging. I include Weissert because this is a "break glass" emergency. Whomever is pitching well at Scranton, Weissert or one of Crashman's eternal collection of MLB scrap heapers, that guy will get a shot.  

Seven weeks left. We remain one a bad road trip away from having to face Tampa in a death match series. It's more than worrisome that Giancarlo says his ankle still hurts, and that Harrison Bader attempted to come back early with St. Louis - and that's why he's still in Das Boot.

Somebody must come forward. "None of the above" means doom.

39 comments:

BTR999 said...

Honestly,, your guess is it as good as mine. I don’t think Holmes was the real a deal. I kind of think the team wants it to be Loaisiga, but it’s always a crapshoot with him. Don’t say it would never be Chapman - he’s just a few good outings away from retaking the reins.

Meanwhile, Weissert toils in obscurity in SWB. An innocent man, in a living hell.

Carl J. Weitz said...

Robert DeNiro's character in Meet The Family, Jack Byrnes, said it best about the Yankees would-be closers: " Once you leave the Circle of Trust, there's no getting back in."

DickAllen said...

And on other news, Jordan Montgomery threw a Maddox yesterday.

Thanks Brain.

Jaraxle said...

Clark Schmidt will actually be Clark Kent and save us

DickAllen said...


The first thing that hit my eyeballs this morning was news of Montgomery's Maddux.

I'm so angry I may never watch another Yankees game until that bastard genius The Intern is gone and unemployed. Let him go destroy another franchise.

mik said...



Montgomery has won his first 4 starts with the Cardinals.

Elsewhere JP Sears also traded away is 5-0.

Cashman doing a hell of a job.

DickAllen said...


You can never have enough pitching?

Well, fuck you Cashman. You'll never be anything other than an Intern, the guy who gets coffee, picks up your dry cleaning, and cleans up your dog's shit.

Fuck you, you fucking fuck.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

El Chapo was never the same after the raid on Macho Grande. He lost his nerve for good. And opened the spigot.

Let's hope Lasagna doesn't suffer the same fate.

Kevin said...

Montgomery is now 4-0, .35 era. WTF, could The Brain have been thinking? I will never understand that trade. Well, a little too early to judge, right?

13bit said...

My brain may be clouded by my first - and hopefully last - bout with the Rona virus, but I can still think clearly enough to state two immutable truths:

Brian doesn't know shit about baseball

Hal does not care what happens to the Yankees

Death, taxes and the above are universal.

Joe of AZ said...

Complete game last night too...why the fuck is every other pitch/hitting coach infinitely more successful with our castoff players than our own

DickAllen said...


I am reminded of The Prisoner of Azkaban.

Harry points to where his dead father is about to conjure the patronus charm.

Hermione says: "Nobody is coming."

We'll win the division, yeah, maybe, but at the first sign of a legitimate contender this team will be exposed for what its incompetent Intern of a GM has made it: and also ran, done in three. I'm wishing for good old days where the pain would only last for one wild-card game.

Nobody is coming. We are fucked.

Parson Tom said...

In addition to Montgomery, you have JP Sears succeeding quite nicely for Oakland.

Both lefthanders had to go because, you know, you never really need a healthy lefthander, especially if you can get this treasure trove:
1. a righthander who has never been particularly good but was overused this year and last year.
2. a fleet centerfielder who's hobbling around in a boot.

Cashman thought he couldn't miss. This year, especially after Carpenter arrived, he seemed to be on an epic run. Every roll turned up a winner. He got lucky and then he bet the house on these horrific trades in July.

Flogging in the public square seems warranted.

Parson Tom said...

Kevin, that's what some asshole said to me on twitter today. Too early to judge?

Two young lefthanders are gone, but we gotta see how the mediocre but overused righty pans out.

JM said...

Naw, it's a fine time to judge that trade, Kevin. Cashman is a fucking idiot. Other GMs must laugh behind his back.

DickAllen said...


JM, you speak the truth.

Two good pitchers in exchange for a guy who can't pitch outside the Coliseum and Aaron Hicks Part Two.

The Intern is in over his head and has been for decades.

AboveAverage said...

CashKid's quotes are making the rounds this morning in various articles.

Some of the gems shared by CashBoy:

ABOUT BOONE:

"I think he's done a great job," Cashman said on Monday, according to ESPN. "I think he's managed his players extremely well. ... He's even-keel. It's important for our players to see that, because if he can keep his temperament the same, for the most part, they don't see panic. It doesn't mean he can't lose his cool, which he will from time to time when necessary."

ABOUT THE TEAM:

“The group has my belief,” Cashman said. “I believe strongly in them and I think they are still capable of everything we’ve ever hoped and dreamed, but we have to weather the storm first and foremost.” “We can produce a lot of runs when everything’s in alignment. Right now, it got out of alignment. We’re looking forward to getting that back online sooner rather than later, but it’s easier said than done. This is a very difficult game to play, and it’s even harder when you’re not performing up to your standards.”

The Hammer of God said...

@Kevin, Cashman was preparing the outfield for next year and Judge's contract negotiations. It was a combination of stupidity, hubris, and risk management/finances. I bet you he still thinks that he made a great trade, due to all the boxes being checked for management. HAL probably also thinks that it was a smart trade because it will save him lots of money.

Sears also looked like a good one. It's too bad.

I took in the game on the Mets broadcast yesterday. They were expecting Chapman to come out to close in the 9th. They don't know how bad Chapman has the yips.

Other thoughts regarding the game:

1. D.J. LeMahieu tried to safety squeeze in a run in the 1st inning! Interesting. So I guess Boone also has no confidence in his hitters anymore. I don't blame him for that.

2. Boone made another blunder leaving Domingo German in too long. The Met commentators (as well as I) thought that German would come out after 6. He answered the bell for the 7th and did a good job, getting the first out. Then the pop up happened with Pete Alonso. With a home run hitter coming up, and German obviously tiring, it was high time to have a lefty warming up and to bring in a lefty at that point. Instead, Vogelbach goes bang-zoom, 3-2 game.

3. Loaisiga's sinker is not sinking. Everything is high. He got lucky in the 8th on that high fly to right. That could've been a disaster. Something is definitely off with Loaisiga. His sinker doesn't have that bite at the end, and it's up belt high. There's nothing like a high sinker for hitters. It comes in at the perfect trajectory for their swings. That's why he gives up a ton of hits. If Matt Blake cannot correct it, Loaisiga should go down to the minors and get it fixed.

4. Loaisiga also has a confidence problem. And it's not surprising, the way he's been banged around. After he got the first two outs in the 9th, all of a sudden, Loaisiga starts dealing BB's to Vogelbach. Loaisiga looked like a different pitcher in that last at-bat.

5. Is Domingo German the ace of the team now? I think he has been looking better and better with each start. He is getting back to where he was when he was the Yankees's best pitcher, before the slap sent his career into a tailspin. Somebody keep his girlfriend away.

6. The polarities seemed to be reversed last night. The Mets looked like ... the Yankees. And the Yankees ... looked like the Mets. What I mean is that the Mets only scored two runs on one swing, sort of the Yankee way. And the Yankees got the base hits with runners on base or in scoring position.

7. Benintendi finally starting to look like a .300 hitter. But one ominous thing, Rizzo still hitting barely .200 and I heard that Rizzo's "launch angle" is the highest of his career. That's not a good thing, in my book. It would behoove Rizzo to lower his launch angle and hit more line drives than trying to golf shots into the right field stands. I'd rather have a lefty hitter with .320 average and .400 on base % than see Rizzo hit .220. His home run output will get cut in half, but I'm okay with 18 homers rather than 36. I think it helps the offense a lot more if he raises his average a 100 points.

The Archangel said...

Nester is the ACE
and

Insiders are telling me that Giancarlo is going to be the closer.

Oh, the relief pitcher.
I thought you meant the guy that would take the last AB of any particular game.
Never Mind

Carl J. Weitz said...

@ Parson Tom...I'd choose the firing squad over a flogging. I'd volunteer and I've never fired a gun in my life. Or at least a public firing.

Also, Is it a coincidence that Monty was traded just days after he was emotional at Boone for yanking him after several innings because his pitch count was up ( July 25)? He was pissed and said something to Boone as he walked off the mound. I don't think it was a coincidence.

BTR999 said...

I don’t feel the team has turned it around round by any means. Why - because we won 2 close games in a row? Losing Sears and Montgomery, and gaining Montas? Ugh. My wife had planter fasciitis like Bader, from being on her feet all day. Took her over a year to recover, and she has had reoccurrences since.

With a few bright exceptions, Cashman has really bungled things the last few years. Time for him to go, as a first step in an overall house cleaning to include all his staff and assistants, particularly talent evaluators. A new broom sweeps clean.

Yankee Daddy Roger said...

I am changing my commentary name from O'l Daddy Yankee Roger to "Bader's Boot". I will cease my criticism of players and executives and give you instead my "inside view" of Bader's encased foot. I am able to offer this unique insight because I have x-ray vision like Superman. Aw, why am I being coy, I am Superman. What is the point of a secret identity these days when everything goes down on the internet minutes after it happens. So here is your first taste of the current status of the foot of Harrison Bader:

Toes seem correctly aligned, although there is a malformed sixth toe on the non-affected boot foot. (Please no "Sixto Lezcano" jokes, this is serious podiatric analysis.) It appears as though the ankle has "tarsal tunnel" which is plaguing healing. Neither Yankee nor Cardinal ownership has paid the toll--which, dare I say it, yes, you get it, is the slaughter of baby goats! I guess you can rename your commentary, but you escape reusing your content. Prognosis here is we can anticipate a return sometime after the birth of Baaby's next litter and the sharpening of the knives.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Roger,

I think this is someone you should look into:

wikipedia.org/wiki/Antonio_Alfonseca

JM said...

Didn't Ellsbury have the fascitis problem, too? He didn't ever really come back from that.

Maybe Cashman is secretly supporting a fascitis "early retirement" charity, whereby he gives a pile of money--or a good lefty--to help ensure the future of a blighted ballplayer.

I fully agree with Hammer re: Rizzo. More hitting, less homering. We'd win more games, or at least have a better shot at it. This launch angle stuff is for the birds. When Mantle or Ruth or DiMag stepped up to the plate, do you think they had been working on their launch angle? No. They saw a pitch and hit it, often for hits, pretty often for extra base hits, and plenty for home runs. You hit well, you'll get your dingers if you have power.

Roger...er, Boot...I look forward to your next report on Bader's condition. By the way, does he have bunions? Just wondering.

JM said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
JM said...

Forgot to mention--Meredith says Britton starts his rehab tomorrow with the Tarpoons.

That's Zach, not Benjamin.

AboveAverage said...

https://www.foxnews.com/sports/yankees-fan-drinks-beer-through-makeshift-hot-dog-straw-divides-social-media.

I would have to imagine that tater tot boba will be here with us sooner than I'm comfortable with . . .

JM said...

On Twitter today, Jon Heyman retweeted part of an appearance by Cashman on a talk radio show, where he was asked "the hard questions." I couldn't watch it. But in the tweet, Heyman noted that the Brain was coming under quite a bit of criticism recently--even though his team is projected to win 99 games.

How do guys who don't understand baseball make a lot of money as sports "reporters"? The goal isn't to win 99 or 100 or 120 games. The goal is to win a ring. Period. If you don't do that, you have not succeeded.

As my father used to say, Jesus, that burns me up.

AboveAverage said...

JM - So now I know your name is Jesus. That's what the J stands for.

HoraceClarke66 said...

All of you are forgetting the added benefit of the "launch angle": the endless injuries that come from twisting your body into all those unnatural positions.

Are the incessant injuries of modern HR hitters due to continued juicing—or to all those launch angle pretzels? Both, I suspect.

HoraceClarke66 said...

So, your average drops, your RBI totals melt AND you get hurt. Win-win-win!

HoraceClarke66 said...

Love the idea of continuing updates from inside the Bader Boot.

Interesting analysis of Johnny Lasagna, Hammer. I wonder if his sinker isn't sinking BECAUSE he's pitched so little this year; he's too strong.

In any case, no, we don't have a shot.

JM said...

Good thing we didn't get the David Robertson guy. I mean, where could we have used him?

Hazel Motes said...

Cashman is burying Florial because if he were to succeed, then the absurdity of trading Montgomery for Bader would become even more obvious.

JM said...

AA, just remember that Jesus Montero was a JM, too.

Just thought of that and it frightened me.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Game thread?

JM said...

It's up

Rufus T. Firefly said...

That's what she said...

Wezil1 said...

Did someone mention Benjamin Britten?
I love this blog! Thank you,JM!