Thursday, October 18, 2012

Friends, Yorkers, Yankeefans, lend me your ears; I come to bury A-Rod, not to praise him.

The games men lose in life live after them;
The wins are oft interred with their bones;
So let it be with A-Rod. 
The New York Post hath told you A-Rod was lecherous:
If it were so, it was a grievous fault,
And grievously hath A-Rod answer'd it. 
So here, under leave of Cashman and the rest -
For Cashman is an knowledgeable man;
So are they all, all knowledgeable men -
Come I to speak in A-Rod's funeral.

He was our slugger, famous and proud to us:
But Cashman says he became atrocious;
And Cashman is a knowledgeable man.
A-Rod hath brought eight post-seasons home to York,
Whose ransoms did the Steinbreners' coffers fill:
Did in one week A-Rod become atrocious?
When the whole team fanned, and the fans hath booed:
Atrociousness should be made of sterner stuff:
Yet Cashman says he hath become atrocious;
And Cashman is a knowledgeable man.

You all did read in today's Lupica
That we twice presented A-Rod with an MVP,
And the ring he hath produced: was this atrociousness?
Yet Cashman says he hath become atrocious;
And, sure, he is a knowledgeable man.

I speak not to disprove what Cashman speaks,
But here I am to speak what I do know.
You all did love A-Rod once, not without cause:
What cause withholds you then, to rage against him?
O judgment! thou art fled to Murdochian beasts,
And fans have lost their reason. Bear with me;
My heart is in the dugout there with A-Rod,
And I must pause till it come back to me.

6 comments:

The Sayonara Kid said...

Speak, Strike, REDRESS!

John M said...

I like Alex as a player now more than ever. Strange, maybe, but when he's not hitting a gazillion homers and putting up gaudy numbers, his basic dedication--running out grounders, hard, and playing pretty fine defense for the most part--stand out a lot more.

This whole witch hunt is really sad, and just shows the classless underbelly of the Yankee organization and New York press (and some fans). He's getting old, he's constantly losing time to injuries, his eye is rusty, his swing is slower. But he is still a great PLAYER, and as much as he shoots himself in the foot a lot (he is one weird dude, fer sure), he doesn't deserve being singled out like this and mercilessly shamed in public over and over.

Bench him, fine. But bench Swisher, bench Granderson, leave Cano in for defense and drop him down to 7th.

Or, for one brief shining moment, no matter his age, let Alex play short, the position where he's always belonged. In the current circumstances, what is that going to hurt? Nix and Chavez are not the athletes, plain and simple, that Alex is, and neither causes a twinge of fear and respect in opposing pitchers like Alex.

What the hell. If they're gonna crucify the guy, at least let him have a really good last supper.

Beechwood 45789 said...

The evil he hath done lies interred within his phone

joe de pastry said...

Giving Chavez a chance made sense, but he's not hitting either. They should get Rodrigueez back in there. And what's the point of playing the feeble Gardner? They could win 4 in a row ONLY if most of the guys who produced runs during the season broke out of their slumps together. So put Rodriguez and Granderson back in the lineup. It might not work, but without them, 4 in a row cannot happen

Etu Brutus said...

bravo

Tom from GA said...

BRILLIANT!