Thursday, October 25, 2012

Should Swisher join Grandyman and get some new Prada frames?

The official Yankiverse rumor line seems to be that Nick Swisher is gone from the Tankees. I'll believe it when I see it. 

Swish has always been a likeable, bi-polar West Virginia mope who drank the Kool-Aid of Gotham like mother's milk, and set himself up for a post-baseball career as a sitcom walk-on, card show lugnut or ESPN smiling caballero.  He won't be happy in KC or SD - or any place without celebrity entourages.  It's either New York or LA.

I'm figuring the Mets don't bite. The Dodgers and Angels don't need another OF. That leaves Swish deciding whether to play one more year with the Tankees or spend the rest of his life in a Cleveland of the mind. Frankly, I think he'd rather get himself a new pair of Pradas.

But here's the rub.  I don't think the Tankees want him back. I think they say so in public. After all, he's a popular guy, he hits in the regular season, and he's not the team's only headcase in October. I just think Cashman has moved on.  Swish didn't bring the kind of numbers that befit a multi-year $70 million deal, the anticipated birthright of anybody who hits 20 home runs -- and it just won't come from us.  
Either way, here's the problem: Our rebuilding plan starts with whatever Swish decides. He's got to choose whether to take a one-year package - we will tender him an offer - or head for the money hills of Pittsburgh or Tampa. If he decides to come back, everything we do - from Ichiro to Grandy to Brett Gardner - changes. We'd basically be stuck with him. But there are worse scenarios.

I'm just pondering the day he returns in a Rays uniform.  I hope they're safety glasses.


Anonymous said...

Why doesn't Swisher point to heaven when he strikes out?

John M said...

Swish doesn't look heavenward. He likes to check the weather when batting, and quickly scan the sky for interesting cloud formations or curious combos of nimbus, cirrus and cumulonimbus above the outfield bleachers.

Few people realize that Swisher nearly left baseball to pursue a lifelong dream to be a meteorologist on the Weather Channel, where his irrepressible humor and infectious enthusiasm would be sorely welcome.

joe de pastry said...

rHe's going to Boston, and he will beat us there a couple of times with blasts over the Monster or around the Pesky Pole. If we had somebody to replace him, fine. But I don't want to see an even older Suzuki out there next year.

Took 4 tries to get the not a robot words right. If you don't hear from me much anymore, that time waster will be why.

Tom from GA said...

Hey! Robot defenses must be lowered! What is this, a box seat at Yankee Stadium? Available only to the rich guys from Wall Street? You lose joe de pastry and you've lost another honest voice from the Yankeeverse.

el duque said...

All right. The robot has been destroyed. The people have spoken.