Call off your dogs, Selig. It's over. You won.

Call off your dogs, Selig. It's over. You won.

Monday, October 15, 2012

Where were the Yankee fans? In a disgraceful display of apathy, the New York fans have been as invisible as the Yankee bats

Look, look, look at all the empty seats!  In this shot, I count 15.  It's the middle of a playoff game, a tie game, a critical game, and across Yankee Stadium, look - it's Claude Raines. The Invisible Man.  Nobody came. What loyalty!

Keep in mind that this is the Platinum Club section.  God knows how much these seats cost.  Hundreds of dollars? Thousands? In my lifetime, I'll never afford one. These cushioned seats were meant to hold the brie-complexioned fannies of super-rich Wall Street nut-twads and their supermodel trophies. Unfortunately, they had better things to do this weekend. It must have been dock day at the lake! Or maybe the Commodore at the Yacht Club was celebrating his grand-daughter's first Porsche. In the commotion, they forgot to give the tickets to the yard man.

LOOK AT ALL THOSE FRICKIN EMPTY SEATS! Whenever a TBS camera panned in on a field-level shot, blue seats filled the backdrop. Where were the fans? In the restrooms, making sex videos? In the five-star steak house? Were they dancing in the stadium disco lounge? WHERE WERE THEY? What happened to the Yankee fan base? How could the Yankiverse embarrass itself like this - confirming every negative stereotype ever made about fat cat New Yorkers by the NASCAR crotch-scratchers of Red State America.

Disgraceful. SHAME ON US! SHAME! The turd pile - that ridiculous stadium that Rudy Giuliani built, the one that priced true Yankee fans out of the field level - is collapsing in on itself.

In game one, Austin Jackson scored a triple on a ball that rolled down the right field sideline, and no fan bothered to reach down and touch it, holding him to a ground rule double. Once, it was a given that Yankee fans were the most knowledgeable in the game. Now, if we bother to show up, we're barely aware of what's happening.

All weekend, the pikers in the 1 percent seats let Tigers chase fouls and - frankly - caused more commotion when a Yankee closed into foul territory. Meanwhile, the Bleacher Creatures dissed players in the roll call - listen: I understand booing after a strikeout, but in the roll call? After the game, a visibly hurt Nick Swisher spoke about the negativity of hearing fans blame him for Derek Jeter's injury - (Listen: I hope Swish is gone this winter, I can't take another post-season collapse by the guy; he should go to Kansas City, get his numbers and never again have to play in October) -- but to blame him for Jeter's ankle? Aww, c'mon.

Shame on us. Folks, the great turd pile is collapsing. We're watching the mighty Yankees do in a week what it took Boston to destroy in a year. This is our September of 2011. A-Rod is our John Lackey.  Robbie Cano is our Josh Beckett. Joe is Terry Francona, the team is out the window, and everybody is eating fried chicken in the clubhouse.

Including the fans.

Let this be known: The fans of New York City are as disgraceful as this team.

This weekend, neither showed up.

6 comments:

Alphonso said...

They were playing golf and tuning into the game on I-phones.

Rich people don't like discomfort, and watching Cano live is now too painful. Add to that A-Rod, Swisher and Granderson, and you have dog turd on those $1100 golfing shoes.

If the Yankees ever batted in a runner, without a home run, they would be helicoptered back to their seats. But that hasn't happened since June.

Alibi Ike said...

Behind home plate looked like a furniture showroom, but there were a lot of empty seats in the upper deck, too.

The team should hire extras to sit in those seats like they do at the Oscars.

el duque said...

That's a great idea. And it's the only way real fans might ever get to see one of these games.

Alibi Ike said...

It'll keep the tushies of the plutocrats warm when they come back from the steakhouse to an occupied seat. AND they can get out their buggy whips and act all outraged that some riff-raff made it to the good seats. That'll be the best way to sell it.

el duque said...

Absolutely, brilliant. It's better than StubHub.

joe de pastry said...

I've been pessimistic all year, but for some reason I'm not now. I've a feeling that the whole slumping lineup is going to break out of it at once and they will win four in a row.