Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Stupidity is, apparently, the Yankees' best strategy

Look, I liked last night's performance of "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Ichiro" as much as anyone, but Ich's best ninja impression had everyone so giddy that no one asked the obvious question: Why the hell was he sent?

I understand being aggressive, and I understand there were two outs, but the ball beat him by 20 feet easy. It wasn't even close. There's a line where aggression becomes stupidity. This crossed it.

Of course, we all know why Rob Thompson sent him. Because he knew what we all learned while watching the Yankees this season. A Yankee standing on second or third base might as well just jog back to the dugout. Those bases are where Yankee runners go to die. We can't drive them in.

But wait, we had our No. 5 hitter coming up!  Yeah, Swish was on deck, and how much has he come through with big hits in the postseason? (I love Swish, and I'm rooting for him, more than any other player, to be our post-season hero this year. He'd be 2012's version of Hideki Matsui, getting one last hurrah before heading off to finish his career somewhere else ... because you really don't think Hal's going to pony up any cash to keep him, do you? But he hasn't exactly been Mr. Clutch in the postseason.)

Look, the rest of the game proved out what we already know ... put runners on second and third, and the Yankees suddenly carry Wiffle-ball bats to the plate. Over and over. How many times did an inning end, and you said, "Sunuvabutch, we missed another chance." It happens so much it's all a blur. Look back at Game 1 ... honestly, the score should've been 7-2 entering the ninth inning, not at the end of it. But we can't drive in a goddam run.

So expect more of the same, folks. Rob Thompson, send everyone. I don't care if Wieters is standing in front of home plate with the ball already in his glove. Wave everyone home. Maybe lightning will strike twice and we get another "The Matrix" performance. If not, hell, at least we've been spared the agony of watching runner after runner stranded on third while we take called third strikes or hit pop flies to the shortstop.

Baltimore is trying to hand us this series, folks (exhibit A: J.J. Hardy's play last night). We should have won both games in blowouts. Instead, we're 1-1. We got our mulligan in Game 1. We're probably not going to get another.


John M said...

It's not that bad. Really, it's not. Honest. We're still in it. No kidding, we are.

Aw, shit.

I'm pinning my hopes to home field advantage. Nobody does the right field porch like today's Yankees.

Is it too late to activate Dandruff Jones? Sorry, Andruff. I mean, Andrew...er, druw. You know who I mean.

Dr. Drew said...

Stupid but smart long-term strategy: Bat A-Rod 9th and play him only against lefties. Get him so pissed off that he negotiates a buy-out or just retires. I don't care if they still pay him the full value of his contract -- it's not my money -- but I do care if he continues to kill every rally with his feeble whiffs. The guy has always been soft in the head -- how else to explain his great overall numbers against his miserable performance in high-pressure situations?

Anonymous said...

Oh, yeah. Like his miserable performance in 2009! You remember. The year he carried the team to a world championship?