Monday, February 18, 2013

Carl Pavano nearly died shoveling snow

Jeeze Louise.  The guy slipped on ice, fell on his shovel and put a divot into his spleen. If he hadn't gone to the E.R. when he did, the Twins would be wearing black arm-bands this year.

They removed his spleen. He's lost a lot of weight. He's vowing to return. I dunno.

Hard to think about Pavano, considering all the pain he brought upon the Yankiverse. Remember when he broke a rib in a car accident with his hot model girlfriend, and he didn't tell anybody? Remember when he pulled a buttock covering first? Remember our Yankeeography: The Bronx Buttocks?

If he were going to lose a spleen, we wanted it to come from a line-drive off Jeter's bat. But when you look at Pavano's life, it's quite sad. There is only one period in the fossil record when Pavano totally sucked: While a Yankee.

Take away those four years, and the guy had a nice career. But in NY, he won just seven (7) games.

Imagine: If Pavano pitched the way he did before and after the Yankees, he would have won 64 games in that stretch. Considering that we scored a lot of runs, he might have won 20 one year. He'd now be chasing his 200th victory - not Hall of Fame material, but not shabby.

Also, he was a post-season workhorse for Florida and Minnesota, with a 2.51 ERA. Can't help but think he might have won a game for us in the 2005 or 2006 playoffs, maybe changed Yankee history. If we'd gotten anything from the guy - anything - who knows how popular he might have been? 

I say this not to forgive the guy. He sucked for us. You can hate a player, while not  hating the player. Let's hope he comes back, so we can shell him a few more times. Jeeze Louise. A few hours delay, and we'd be reading his obit. Didn't want that.


Buck Showalter said...

Duque, It appears you have gone from splenetic to good-spleened as far a Carl goes. Could you cut me some slack also.

el duque said...

I'd tear out Showalter's spleen myself, if he gets too close.

George Jung said...

Yeah, Carl, I can totally relate. Shovelin' snow nearly took me down, too. But it also garnered me a major motion picture. So in the end, was it worth it? Jesus Christ. How irreparably changed my life has become. It's always the last day of summer and I've been left out in the cold with no door to get back in. I'll grant you I've had more than my share of poignant moments. Life passes most people by while they're making grand plans for it. Throughout my lifetime, I've left pieces of my heart here and there. And now, there's almost not enough to stay alive. But I force a smile, knowing that my ambition far exceeded my talent. There are no more white horses or pretty ladies at my door. Hang in there, Carl.

Anonymous said...

I'll do some yayo....