Friday, February 8, 2013

Cashman's ex lowers the boom

The Daily Murdoch sent two reporters this week to dig the latest toxic dirt on Brian Cashman's dangerous love life, which has ascended into Yankee lore with the likes of Fritz Peterson's trades and Scott Proctor's firestarter. The nut graph says that Cashman will pay his wife $1 million a year in child support until the year 2525, if man still alive, or she accepts Alphonso's weekly marriage proposals.

Ah, Cash. A word about Brian McGuire Cashman... (See his famous IT IS HIGH Yankeeography)

I'm tempted to think of Randy Newman's take on Lester Maddox: He may be a fool but he's our fool. But Cashman is no fool - love life not withstanding. He's bright, intellectual and - considering his Machiavellian survival skills within the Steinbrenner Game of Thrones - functionally brilliant in the art of political self-defense. He could have been a governor, or the inventor of Velcro. But he became a Yankee.

He is relentless in his work ethic: How many times on holiday weekends have the Yankees pounced on a scrap heap player basically unknown to the Yankiverse - good grief, Eli Whiteside! - or roped his way down a building for charity. In interviews, his words are parsed and analyzed like a U.S. Supreme Court justice. He personifies not only the Yankees but corporate sports in America. More than anybody - more than A-Rod, more than Hal, yes, even more than Jeter and Mo - to people who follow the game closely, he is the enduring face of the New York Yankees.

He turns 46 this year, his 15th as Yankee GM. If not already, he will someday be the longest running Yankee GM in history. And like NY players who get screwed in the All-Star vote or Cooperstown (Roger Maris!),  Cashman never gets credit for the victories. The critics cite Yankee money, not Yankee ingenuity.

Well, we're about to see about that. The next two years are Cashman's legacy. This year ends the talent surge spawned long ago by Bob Watson. Next year starts the new era, whatever it will be. The Yankees won't be harvesting the free agent market. They'll be relying on Cashman's organization.

Cash owes his ex $1 million a year. Chump change if the Yankees win. It's a hefty bill if he's still trading for love or standing at home plate, torching his mitt and spikes.


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I'm Bill White said...

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Kevin Youkilis said...

Heh, heh, heh. I AM "ANONYMOUS"! You guys trash me in this blog, so I trash your blog. I can't wait to flip the bird at you guys on Opening Day in the Bronx. I have been flippin' off opponents since the 1880s and am still going strong. Kevin Youkilis: 120 years of being a punk and loving every minute of it. Don't miss me giving Joba a hot foot in the bullpen. Hah Hah Hah! Don't forget you make a pact with the Devil when you sign with the Red Sox, and no one-year contract with the Yankees will negate that. Alphonso, I'm looking for you in the stands, so maybe you better boycott when I'm in the lineup. Hah hah hah!! I'm SO evil.