As the Captain, Derek Jeter, steps up to the plate, stepping up to the microphone is the voice of the New York Yankees, John Sterling.
No amount of hair can improve THAT mug. That fella is so ugly he looks like he's been whopped with an ugly stick.
Please allow me to elaborate further. If I became a New York Yankee I would (a) organize Joe Girardi's binder; (b) wrap gift baskets for Jeter's one-night stands; (c) dispose of Grandyman's used bubblegum; (d) massage A-Rod's posterior between innings so that he didn't cramp up; (e) enroll in anger management classes with Kevin Youkilis; (f) attend AA meetings with Michael Pineda; (g) buy a helmet for Gary Sanchez; and (h) worship John Sterling. That better now? Thanks. David PS Is Suzyn married?
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