Friday, May 23, 2014

How does John Ryan Murphy rate having everyone use his middle name?

Used to be, to get a famous middle name, you needed to be a President or to shoot one. In rare instances did Yankee middle names become known. Here's my off-hand ranking of the greatest Yankee Middle Names.

1. George Herman
2. Lawrence Peter
3. Mickey Charles
4. Derek Sanderson
5. Bucky F---g.

OK, delete number five. Still, you with me? Hardly any Yankees - even the greats - get immortalized by middle names. Don Mattlingly? Haven't a clue. Mariano Rivera? He still needs to shoot a president.

So... how did John Ryan Murphy do it? Why isn't he just John Murphy? Yes, it's sort of a common name, but it's no Jose Cruz. According to Baseball Reference, there are three John Murphys in MLB history, including John "Soldier Boy" Murphy, the scrappy 5'7" inch infielder who played for the Tigers and Cardinals in 1902-03. His middle name was Patrick.

So what happened with John Ryan Murphy? He came up last season as J.R. Murphy - a cool name, which stands for "Junior" in some circles, and the TV show "Dallas" in others. Last fall, it was J.R. Murphy who walked out to the mound for Mariano Rivera's final moment as a Yankee. Last year, it was J.R. Murphy who came up from Scranton to represent the lone Yankee prospect ready to climb up from the diseased primordial pool of our farm system. But this year, he is John Ryan Murphy.

Did he shoot somebody? Did I miss something? What happened?

My guess: His mom called. Or an aunt. She called Hal Steinbrenner, or Rupert Murdoch, or Cashman, or even The Master, and reamed them out. Maybe she was drunk. She screamed at them. She cried. They cowered. They apologized. They pushed out a memo. And now we have a middle name - a Yankee rarity - which I hope the team takes into consideration during trade talks next month. Because if I were another team, and I were dangling a thirty-something rag-armed starter, a guy whose middle name we will never bother to consider, then John Ryan Murphy would be the young Yankee I wanted in exchange.

I hope it never happens. Lets hope Theo Epstein decides it's not worth it to get John Ryan Murphy, because he doesn't want to deal with the phone calls.  


KD said...

Love the middle name thing. That's why I've been known to shout "You da man, Carston Charles Sabathia!"

well, at least I USED to yell that....

Anonymous said...

Good point El Duque. This John Ryan stuff is really stupid. I wonder if John Sloss has a middle name?

Alphonso said...

I know the story.

All through his younger days, the boy was
called, " John Ryan Murphy." Kindergarten, elementary school , and high school.

All his friends and relatives, of course, followed his baseball career. When he got to the Yankee minor league system, the " baseball people " and reporters started calling him JR Murphy, to distinguish him from other Murphys. Plus, having initials for a first name is cool in baseball.

But his mother, his family and all his friends complained. They never could find any news of the player they had known all their lives; John Ryan Murphy.

There was a lot written about someone called,, " JR Murphy," but they paid no attention. It did not register that JR was the very same guy they adored.

At some point early this year, the mom made a big deal of this, and the media confirmed with Murphy that, " I have always been called John Ryan Murphy."

And he asked theta they always refer to him by that name. So they did.

He is one of the best young players we have. Put a no-trade label on him now.

Mikegyro said...

Donald Arthur Mattingly. Michael Kay used to use his middle name a lot in the early 90's when talking about Donnie baseball.

KD said...

Duque: use your vast influence and start a "Keep John Ryan Murphy in Pinstrips" petition. we need to get out in front of this thing before he becomes a Cub.

Anonymous said...

You can call him Maria of Romania for all I care as long as he keeps playing as he has, and the "No Trade" petition is a great idea. I'll be the first to sign it (well, maybe the second).