Wednesday, May 14, 2014
Posted by Alphonso at 11:32 AM
Take 13 wins in 26 games. Figure out the percentage of wins ( or losses if you are really clever ).
You get .500 as in, " this may not be a .500 team ."
Now, allow me to display for you some of what that means.
.500 Teams :
1. Are fodder for teams heading to the playoffs.
2. Work well for pitchers and hitters on other teams trying to "pad" their stats.
3. Become "target teams" for former stars looking to secure their financial futures.
4. Either are playing for the future ( e.g. using lots of prospects and young talent ) or are delusional.
5. Are non-competitive in general ( think: Kansas City Royals, think; Houston Astros. )
6. Get two-hit shutouts pitched against them by rookies just up from Buffalo.
7. Free teams from horrendous slumps and put them back on track.
8. Get behind early in games and almost never come back to win.
9. Mostly score by hitting solo home runs.
10. Never win extra inning games.
11. Get bad breaks ( base running stumbles and confusion; see doubles turn into singles due to
bounces; watch base clearing doubles become ground rule doubles; lose on challenges; get burned by umpires on missed strike calls.
12. Don't have quality depth.
13. Have no prospects due to bad drafts, trades and free agent signings.
14. Are plagued with injuries.
15. Get few clutch hits.
16. Have management who keep doing things the same old way, and continue to fail in the same old way.
17. Have owners that scream for change and then fire the guy in the weight room.
18. Are rejected by fans in favor of NFL training camps by early August.
Shall I go on? The next step for reasonable people is as follows:
YOU HAVE FAILED IN YOUR JOB. NOT ALWAYS, BUT THE DAMAGE TO THE PRESENT AND THE FUTURE IS EXTENSIVE. IT IS TIME TO PAY THE PRICE. YOU ARE STILL RICH.
RESIGN AND TAKE UP A MUSICAL INSTRUMENT.