Wednesday, October 31, 2018

The 2018 Yankees Dubious Achievements Awards, Part the First-o





With all apologies to Esquire magazine, what this wretched year really needs is a Dubious Achievements Awards for the Yankees.  So here we go.

Feel free to chime in with your own suggestions, shout-downs, or alternate realities!

Gloat of the Year:  This has to go to Joe Girardi.  Last season he came within one game of reaching the World Series with a team no one expected to be a contender—only to be fired for committing a major blunder in the playoffs (failing to challenge that call in Cleveland) that ultimately cost the Yankees nothing, and for allegedly failing to handle the kids well.

So who is he replaced with?  Why, Ma Boone, who promptly left the Yankees a good six wins why of the Fall Classic by committing a major blunder in the playoffs (failing to bat his best hitter even after falling behind the Sox by four runs), a move that cost the Yanks everything, and for failing to motivate the kids even to do things like chase passed balls or show up on time for their warm-ups in a playoff start.

Joe must have been chortling all through his amazing workout sessions.

Goat of the Year:  Who is 2018's major flop?  The candidates are legion:  Giancarlo Stanton, Sonny Gray, Greg Bird, ICS—maybe even Luis Severino.

I have to say that, as disappointing as Stanton's season was, his hitting did at least carry the team for about a month when we were all out of outfielders.  Severino's failure to show up on time for a playoff game, and his whole second half of ill-suppressed hysteria remain inexplicable, as well as unforgivable (I still think it will end up involving drugs, and not the performance-enhancing kind), but he did have that lights-out first half.

Sonny's Stadium choking was pretty awful...but then, how much did we really expect out of him?  And Bird's awful season might be put down to injuries—or maybe us overrating him to begin with.

To be sure, Sanchez was injured, too.  But his season was so completely dreadful—a complete shambles in the field, the worst meltdown at the plate (considering what he showed himself to be capable of) of any major-leaguer in 50 years...oh, and then there was the Montero-like dedication to the game!

This guy went from looking like a young Johnny Bench to an old Rick Cerone in about six seconds flat.  Gary "ICS" Sanchez, you are not only our Goat of 2018, but a strong candidate to repeat next season!

Worst Managerial Decision of the Year:  I think it was, once again, Ma's crazy-ass decision not to put Andujar in even after the Yanks got down four runs in a do-or-die playoff game against the Red Sox that they ended up losing by one run.

This convinced me that that Boone was either so attached to a discredited philosophy of baseball on his own, or so beholden to Brian Cashman, that he could be replaced in the dugout with a mannequin.    (My apologies to any mannequins who may be offended by that.)

Worst Cashman Decision of the Year:  This one really is a puzzler, especially since we don't really know what all of his options were.

I guess I can forgive the Stanton deal—hey, it opened up a spot for Torres, and we seem to have surrendered nothing of value—and not pulling the trigger on Gerrit Cole.  The Pirates seem to have wanted too much from us and anyway, you know, I know, and the American people know that Cole was never going to make that huge career u-turn with OUR instructional team.

A much worse moment was his getting rid of all of our back-up outfielders just before Aaron Judge got hurt—and then after he got hurt.  But hey, at least they don't look like they'll be world beaters elsewhere.

I guess for me that leaves his having such a terrible instructional team on the ground in the first place, Boone and all his coaches.  Not to mention whatever dimwits are now running the farm system.

But then, so much of THEIR abysmality probably stems from Cashman's own, typically fatuous desire to adopt the Baseball Fashion du Jour—Throw fastballs for two innings, swing for the fences always—without really understanding the analytics behind it.

In other words, Cashman's worst decision was...being Brian Cashman.

More to come, you lucky dogs!  And Happy Halloween!





10 comments:

Anonymous said...


Gloat of the Year:

Aaron Judge for playing "New York New York" after our single paltry win against the Sox. While it is not the "I told you so" type gloat who says this award has to be a positive one? Did it fire up the Sox?

Goat of the Year:

I'm going to go with Aaron Boone for all the reasons you so accurately pointed out in your Gloat Award. Golem Teams don't happen on their own and as has been mentioned they won 100 games in spite of his managing not because of it.

Worst Managerial Decision of the Year:

You nailed it. Could also be in the running with Worst Managerial Decision of the Millennium.

Worst Cashman Decision of the Year:

You make a strong case for Cashman being Cashman. I want to say Boone but since it's only October I get the feeling that the Worst Cashman Decision of the Year is sadly, still up for grabs.

He are a few more...

Worst Ability to Recognize a Pitch That is Clearly a Ball and It's Not Even Close:

We have our first tie. Stanton and Sanchez. Low and outside. Low and outside. Low and outside. Say it with me. Low and outside.

The Balsa Slugger (Given to player whose at bats were worthless):

Greg Bird

The Lead Glove:

Gary Sanchez


And last but not least the coveted (Because who doesn't like something for nothing?)

Alex Rodriquez "Life's a Beach Award"

(Given each year to the player who got in excess of 20 million dollars for not playing a single inning. Previous winners include Alex Rodriquez and Alex Rodriguez):

Jacoby Ellsbury.


Doug K.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Hilarious, Doug K.!

I do feel the whole Judge "New York, New York" moment has been overrated. You always hear that sort of thing from sportswriters—"Don't give them anything for their bulletin board"—but this isn't football, where you want to go out there seeing red, and if you're not already stoked for a playoff game against your arch-rival, after a season in which you won 108 games, well then, you're not a professional sports team. (Although I imagine the Golem Team would be capable of that.)

As for your "Worst Inability to Recognize a Pitch That Is a Ball and It's Not Even Close" award, we should attach Alfonso Soriano's name to it.

Although on second thought, Soriano kept getting tempted by pitches that were juuuust out of his range. He was Ted Williams compared to these idiots.

Anonymous said...

I LIKE THIS SEGMENT HOSS...

I THINK SANCHEZ IS THE ONE WHO IS ON SOMETHING, NOT SEVERINO.

SEVY IS TIPPING HIS PITCHES, THERE IS NO DOUBT.

RED SOX PLAYERS WHISPERING THE PITCH (CORRECTLY), BEFORE HE DELIVERS THE PITCH.

OTHER TEAMS TOO.

I FIND IT AMAZING THAT NONE OF OUR COACHES CAN SPOT AND CORRECT THIS PROBLEM.

WHAT ARE THEY GETTING PAID FOR?

Anonymous said...

Hoss,

Actually it's funny (not haha funny) but I just went to the NY Post and it had this (I saw that it's dealt with in the next thread but --_

"The Red Sox manager, at Wednesday’s victory parade three days after they overwhelmed the Dodgers, pointed to the playoff turning point: the Yankees’ lowest moment of the season.

“The sky was falling and we lost Game 2 and there was panic in here,” Cora said in Boston. “Everybody was like, ‘Whoa. It’s over.’

and then Judge plays NY NY no?

"As for your "Worst Inability to Recognize a Pitch That Is a Ball and It's Not Even Close" award, we should attach Alfonso Soriano's name to it." Yes! A name for sure. If not Soriano how about Starlin Castro. But Yes!

Doug K.




Unknown said...

The fact we have went from having the 2nd best farm system in MLB to the 17th and only have Luke Voigt to show for it is for me is one of the worst things that has happened.

Prospect hugger I maybe and perhaps I don't yet understand the game enough but it seems to me the more good prospects you have the better as so many fail to make the grade and the more chance you have of creating a new core 4 is to hold onto as many as you can not trade them for rentals to get to a one game playoff which is what we have done now we have decimated the farm system for nothing.

KD said...

The Yankees have said that if they don't win a championship, the season is a failure. perhaps this attitude is what drives them to so many single season rentals with zero faith in rookies( even if they have seasons that rival Joe D). Boston? They believe in actual rebuilding. might even finish last occasionally! rebuilding to Hal would be a terrible loss of revenue. damn. try being smart for a change.

Carl J. Weitz said...

Speaking of Halloween, this is a fitting tribute to the day:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RPRFh2aOGdg

Bennie Fitz said...

By far, the worst decision of the year was hiring Boone. Sanchez wasn't the only one who regressed; the team regressed as a whole. No fundamentals. Sloppy. Lackadaisical. They played like it was spring training in May and like it was May in September. One dimensional offense. Brutal mismanagement of the best bullpen in baseball. Poor pitcher management overall.

And the in-game decision-making? Wow. Amateurish. Bungling. Incompetent. Little league quality.

Thank god they resigned Gardner. At least there will be at least one real leader in the clubhouse.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Not sure what you were saying, Doug K.

Cora was claiming that Judge playing "New York, New York" saved that series?

Uh, right.

In Game Three, we managed to score all of one run in a Nathan Eovaldi start, and our starting "ace" couldn't even get to the mound in time. I don't think his angering the Red Sox had much to do with a meltdown that titanic. But you know, managers and sportswriters like to keep that sort of nonsense going.

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