Friday, June 1, 2018

The question no one dares to answer


O, how little we mortals care to know... 

FACT: On May 9, an INTERNATIONAL JUJU INTERVENTION was held on Mr. Brett Gardner!


FACT: At the time, he was batting .198!

FACT: That night, during the IJI, he went 3 for 5 with two doubles!

FACT: His batting average is now .256!


8 comments:

TheWinWarblist said...

I felt a terrible disturbance in the fabric of the universe that evening. Like a shock of lightning falling from the ether that coursed through my pants into my head and down my spine. (It especially tickled when it went through the plate in my skull!) It rooted me in place like a wicked change-up. What was wrought that night? Can the mortal comprehend? We should not spake of it in this forum. The sizzled head-pants are warning enough.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Our power is AWESOME!

KD said...

That was an impressive iji, plus it seems to have staying power. However, this is not a shocker to those of us who believe and who’ve been your minions for many years.

Pity the regular people. Those that live in the here and now. They have no connection to the spiritual realm nor appreciation for our rituals and rights. Open your eyes and BEHOLD THE POWER OF JUJU!!!!

TheWinWarblist said...

Noooooooooooo!!! WE MUST NOT SPAKE OF IT !!!!!!!!!

13bit said...

I hear he is shooting up baby monkey glands.

KD said...

Duque figure out Gardner’s BA since the iji. Bet it’s around .350.

Dr. Warblist, there’s some controversy there. Do we speak it into existence? Or by speaking of it, do we dilute its power and mystery?

HoraceClarke66 said...

Just had the scare of a lifetime. These Mets fans who hang out on the stoop tried to convince me that
Torres had tested positive for PEDs. I laughed them off—then raced upstairs to the computer. One heart
attack later...

Rufus T. Firefly said...

KD,

Gardner is 13 for 31 in that span. Good for .419 with 3 HRs.

One negative in that stretch is zero walks. Could this be his Toe tribute?