Last night, Rudy Giuliani and Sean Hannity made plans for their next Yankee outing

Channel-hopping last night, I accidentally landed on Hannity... and there it was: The full moon face of Rudy Giuliani, his forehead the size of a supermodel's back, eyes ablaze, grinning like Count Orlok. Before I could click onward, the revelation struck me - Holy shit! I bolted upright, spilling Cheetos from the bowl on my chest...

He was talking about the Yankees! 

Listen: I am not making this up. What follows is my best reconstruction of the sparkling conversation between America's Mayor and Sean Hannity, the de facto White House Press Secretary. Turns out, Rudy was envisioning the crowd at Yankee Stadium sometime soon.  

Rudy: Twenty thousand people! We'll each be separated by a couple of empty seats. 

Hannity: You'll like it. That way, you won't have to hear me talk all the time!

Rudy: It'll be just like normal, except fewer people in the stands.

Hannity: You should see this guy. Mr. Mayor here always gets the best seats in the house, right next to the Yankee dugout!

Rudy: They'll space everyone out, so people can do their 'social distancing.'

Hannity: You'll love it. You won't have to hear me talk all the time!

Rudy: Maybe thirty thousand.

Hannity: When I go to games, I talk all the time. That's the way I am at games. I just talk all the time.

Rudy: Maybe sitting one seat apart.

Hannity: You'll love it. You won't have to hear me talk all the time!

Oh, the joys of confinement. Every day, we learn something new.