Thursday, February 11, 2021

How Far and How Often?

 The pundits of baseball have decided that, during the pandemic season, the baseball did not have enough heft.   Lightweights were clubbing homers by the score.  It was hurting the game.  Homers or strikeouts...that was pretty much it.

To add fairness and balance to the second season of Covid, the Council of Great Brains have decided to add weight and mass to the ball.  

Here is a photo of he new ball, before the cowhide cover ( and mud from the Delaware ) has been added:

My question is;  how far and how often can Giancarlo loft this one?  

The Yankees have the greatest home run hitter in fantasy baseball.  He stands 6'7" and weighs 255 pounds.  He dead-lifts three cheerleaders. 

And let's not forget how the Yankees were blessed when Giancarlo mysteriously opted to remain with the Yankees for the next seven years of his contract........despite all the other teams willing to pay so much more for him ( the details of these offers were kept secret, so that no one would be embarrassed ).

So Giancarlo now gets a dead ball to hit out.  It has a larger circumference and he may improve his " made contact" stat.  

Who can't wait for this season to begin?  


5 comments:

Carl J. Weitz said...

Alphonso....after looking at the new MLB baseball, perhaps we can re-animate Dick Webber to be our new DH. If the voodoo doesn't works his son Pete could probably persuaded to sign.

Anonymous said...

Wait, isn't that image of one of those blow mold toy bowling balls from the 80s? Those sets with the brightly colored pins? I had a set as a child.

Anonymous said...

On the upside, Sanchez's K rate would go down as well. On the downside, pitchers would have a lot more arm and finger injuries,
The Archangel

Anonymous said...

Sadly Sanchez's passed ball rate would stay the same.

Doug K.

Alphonso said...

As would Sanchez' success in throwing out base-stealers.

Imagine throwing that sucker from your knees.